


two cats

by rideahorse



Series: two cats [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), But light angst, College Kuroo, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Humor, M/M, Mutual Pining, Texting, Third Year Kenma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-28
Updated: 2016-03-24
Packaged: 2018-05-16 22:18:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 19,886
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5843116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rideahorse/pseuds/rideahorse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>(12:01) From: Kenma :3<br/>and why won’t you tell me what the secret is?</p><p>(12:02) To: Kenma :3<br/>there r some things even i won’t say over txt</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is highly self-indulgent because Kuroo is a lean mean meme machine but I love imagining all his texts with his best friend and so here we are. Also the title is lame but it's just the name of my kuroken playlist so i stuck with it.
> 
> Please note the italics are kenma and the normal text is kuroo. eventually, bold is bokuto (bc that whole child is the embodiment of bold text)

** _Wednesday, December 7th_ **

8:23 kenma wake up

 

8:24 _i’m at school, kuroo. stop texting me_

 

8:26 no this is important

8:26 akaashi is visiting us??

8:27 he somehow managed to stay w one of the RAs and was all ‘this is cuz i’m interested in the university’ but ???

 

8:30 _what’s wrong with that?_

 

8:31 y aren’t u here

8:32 if he’s visiting how come ur not

8:40 kenma??

 

8:45 _kuroo i’m in class_

 

8:46 ok so reply to me n i’ll leave u alone

 

8:50 _keiji had a class trip. his parents are letting him stay for three extra days, so that’s why he’s with you guys.i figured he would’ve told you._

 

8:51 wait u knew?

 

8:52 _yes. maybe he just wanted to surprise koutarou_

 

8:53 oh

8:53 omg that’s rly cute actually

 

8:55 _can i focus on class now?_

 

8:56 yeah ok get good grades

 

* * *

 

 

4:35 _Image attached._

4:35 _i saw this and she reminded me of you_

 

7:39 sorry i had practice!!

7:40 what is that omg

 

7:49 _it’s a cat that was outside my house_

 

8:00 aw kenma she’s cute

8:01 u think i’m cute don’t u >:)

 

8:02 _she wouldn’t go away so now she’s staying with me, i guess. she really likes my bed. i gave her some milk too._

 

8:03 hey don’t ignore me

8:10 ugh, fine

8:11 what did u name her?

 

8:12 _kuro_

 

8:12 …

8:12 wow so funny, name the black cat kuro, haha, kuro from neko-ma, hahaha. so funny.

 

8:13 _i’m kidding_

8:14 _i named her tubbs_

 

8:14 isn’t that the rly fat cat from that app u play

 

8:15 _yes_

 

8:15 ur unbelievable

 

* * *

 

 

10:21 kenma omg something just happened

 

10:21 _love live_

 

10:22 kenma i’m srs this is important

10:23 fINE

 

10:35 _ok what is it?_

 

10:36 that took FOREVER

 

10:36 _kuroo_

 

10:37 ok ok so bokuto was tryn get akaashi a gift right?? like a late bday gift?

 

10:37 _ok_

 

10:37 right and he got akaashi this rly dumb stuffed owl thing?? like imo it’s p cute but only bc i can tell it truly captures bo’s personality yknow but like it’s a shitty gift for a normal person

10:38 r u following

 

10:39 _please continue_

 

10:40 ok so he put the owl next to akaashi’s bag while we were at practice and he left this note

10:40 smthn like ‘i think ur a hoot’

10:41 smthn dumb like that

 

10:42 _that does sound like koutarou_

 

10:43 ikr?? so cute

10:43 but anyways so after practice

10:43 bo n i are hiding in one of the shower stalls so we can see akaashi when he opens the gift right? n so we’re hiding and then he comes in and sees the owl and reads the note

10:44 AND THEN

10:45 HE STARTS CRYING

 

10:45 _kuroo, is he okay?_

 

10:46 I DON’T KNOW

10:47 bo n i didn’t know what to do so we just stayed hiding in the shower stall

10:47 eventually he left

10:47 but like idk what to do now and bo is freaking out??? like he’s here and he thinks he totally fucked things up w akaashi and he’s probably gonna start crying and then i’ll start crying and omg kenma i need help can you text akaashi pls pls i’ll buy you a new game

 

10:48 _i want fallout 4_

 

10:48 ok i’ll get u fallout 4 pls just text akaashi

10:49 n then let me know what happened

 

10:50 _ok_

11:32 _so_

 

11:33 omg what happened

11:34 kenma respond

 

11:36 _keiji…really likes owl puns?_

11:36 _he really likes owl puns, kuroo. i don’t know what to do with this information_

 

11:37 wait

11:37 what? u mean…?

 

11:37 _keiji cried because he was happy_

11:38 _he thinks koutarou is really charming?_

 

11:39 WHAT

11:39 I NEED TO TELL BO

11:40 HE’S GONNA BE SO HAPPY

 

11:41 _he’s right next to you_

11:41 _you guys are right down the hall_

11:42 _you could’ve talked to keiji yourselves_

 

11:43 no??

11:44 wait

11:44 wait we could’ve

11:44 kenma y didn’t u tell me this

 

11:45 _i really want fallout 4_

 

11:46 ur a little shit yknow that?

 

11:47 _a deal is a deal_

 

11:48 y am i friends w u

11:48 i could’ve made so many friends w these good looks

11:48 all u do is play video games

11:49 i could’ve had it good, man

 

11:50 _you did try to make more friends_

11:51 _too bad, i guess_

 

11:55 so inconsiderate

11:56 bo is happy btw

11:57 he accidentally knocked a picture off the wall bc he ran into the wall when he was dancing around but that’s ok bc he nailed it w his dream guy

 

11:58 _i thought you were his dream guy_

 

11:59 that’s different

11:59 we’re friends 4 lyfe

11:59 akaashi’s like his husband 4 life

12:00 there’s a difference

 

12:01 _oh?_

12:01 _you do have friends then_

12:02 _guess i was wrong_

 

12:03 aw u can be nice sometimes, that’s reassuring

12:04 tho ur my best friend

12:04 i don’t rank my friends but ur just always part of my life so ur like, idk, higher than a friend

12:04 u don’t even have the same ranking

12:05 good morning btw

 

12:06 _good morning_

 

12:07 u have class tmrw kenma u should sleep

 

12:09 _it’s ok_

 

12:09 no it’s not srsly kenma sleep

12:10 you have to pass ur classes to graduate yknow

 

12:11 _i’m fine kuroo_

 

12:12 kenma if u don’t sleep i won’t buy u fallout 4

 

12:13 _you have to buy it anyways_

12:13 _it was a deal_

12:14 _kuroo we made a deal_

12:16 _kuroo please_

 

12:17 yeah yeah ok i’m still getting it but u rly should sleep

12:17 pls?

 

12:18 _ok_

 

12:19 i’ll talk 2 u tmrw

12:20 goodnight

 

12:21 _goodnight_

 

* * *

 

 

** _Thursday, December 8th_ **

6:19 _i have a question_

 

7:45 sorry i was at practice

7:46 but what is it?

7:46 u don’t have to tell me when u have a question yknow, u can just ask

 

7:49 _am i pretty?_

7:52 _that was weird. i’m sorry_

7:55 _we can forget that_

 

7:56 wait, no

7:57 i was thinking

7:57 what made u ask that question?

 

7:58 _someone called me pretty today and it confused me_

 

7:59 well i mean mayb it’s usually used 4 girls but it can apply to guys too

8:01 a girl called you pretty??

 

8:02 _a boy_

 

8:03 oh

8:03 like…a compliment or?

 

8:04 _he asked me out_

8:04 _but i was confused why he’d call me pretty. because i’m not really special or anything, you know?_

 

8:05 whoa whoa whoa wait

8:05 first of all ur beautiful

8:05 and second of all what did you say??

 

8:06 _what?_

 

8:06 he asked you out?? what did you tell him?

 

8:07 _i said i’d think about it_

 

8:08 oh

 

8:10 _oh?_

 

8:11 no, nothing. so u like him?

 

8:12 _i mean, he’s nice. but i’m not really…i don’t know_

 

8:13 you’re straight?

 

8:14 _no_

 

8:15 oh

 

8:15 _but i don’t know. no one has ever liked me.it’s weird. i don’t like to go out that much, and i don’t think i’d be good for a person, especially because he likes to go out and talk with people and i wouldn’t be able to keep up with that. i can’t make someone like that happy_

 

8:16 i like to go out and talk with people

 

8:17 _but you’re different_

 

8:18 no, i like to go out and talk w people, just like whoever he is, and u make me happy, even if u don’t come w me bc i know you’ll still b there if i wanna call or txt u. just bc u don’t like going out doesn’t mean u can’t make someone rly rly happy

 

8:19 _what are you trying to tell me?_

 

8:20 oh

8:25 maybe u should say yes. go out w him. if ur even considering it, then it might make u happy too

8:26 u deserve to b happy too

 

8:27 _so do you_

 

8:28 hey, what does that mean?

 

8:29 _i don’t know. maybe you should follow your own advice too, then._

 

8:30 what?

 

8:32 _i know you’re not exactly unpopular with the university girls. and guys, too, i’m not dumb.but you never go out with any of them.i know because you would tell me if you did.but you don’t, and i know volleyball isn’t taking up that much of your time, so i think maybe you should take your own advice and find yourself happiness too_

 

8:35 haha don’t b dumb

8:36 i’m happy, i have u and bo and sawamura and even that kusokawa

 

8:37 _you have friends_

 

8:38 yeah, and???

8:39 what’s ur point kenma

 

8:40 _nothing_

 

8:41 kenma i’m srs don’t b flaky on me just this once

 

8:42 _i think you should live a little_

 

8:43 oh n ur the one telling me this??

8:44 have u seen urself kenma

 

8:45 _yes but at least i’m making /new/ friends, kuroo_

 

8:50 you’re making new friends?

 

8:51 _yes_

 

8:52 so i’m just some deadbeat sticking around w a high school student huh

 

8:53 _that’s not what i’m saying_

 

8:53 well kenma u won’t tell me what you ARE saying so what am i supposed to take from this??

8:54 ur movin on, u have dates and new friends, and i’m just some idiot who’s annoying u?

 

8:55 _no_

 

8:56 just fuckin talk to me, then

8:57 eleven years of this shit n u still won’t even tell me what’s on ur mind

 

8:59 _i do talk with you_

 

9:01 yeah but it’s always some bullshit psychoanalysis of me

9:02 u never tell me how u feel about things

9:02 it’s always just me trying to guess

 

9:03 _i’m sorry_

 

9:10 i know

9:11 me too

9:11 i’m not tryin to start a fight

 

9:12 _i know_

 

9:13 i wanna talk w u face-to-face again, yknow?

9:14 miss seein u

9:14 being able to tease u about ur nose plastered to ur psp

 

9:15 _my hair’s grown out too_

9:16 _you can tease me about that when we see each other again_

 

9:17 how much longer until ur break?

 

9:18 _a little less than two weeks_

 

9:19 too long

 

9:19 _i can’t just leave school_

 

9:20 yeah but

9:21 i can

 

9:22 _don’t be stupid. you have your finals in just over a month. if you leave school, you won’t study, and then you’ll fail_

 

9:23 i could study w u, just like we used to

 

9:24 _but you wouldn’t, you’d be too busy catching up with people you missed and probably making my mom an apple pie and doing whatever else just to avoid studying_

 

9:25 shit

9:25 u know me too well

9:26 what a weakness

9:26 i can’t let kusokawa-chan find out

 

9:27 _i’ll see you in two weeks, okay?_

 

9:28 yeah

9:30 bo just realized he has nothing to wear on his date w akaashi (woohoo) so i gtg help him find something presentable at the store so i’ll ttyl

 

9:31 _alright, i’m going to go to bed early because i have a test tomorrow, so i’ll be sleeping when you get back, probably.goodnight_

 

9:32 goodnight kenma

 

* * *

 

 

12:35 ik ur asleep but if u rly think that guy will mayb make u happy then pls say yes to him. i want u to be happy.

 

* * *

 

 

** _Friday, December 9th_ **

4:50 how was ur test

 

5:01 _passable_

 

5:02 ok good

 

* * *

 

 

8:31 kenma i’m bored talk 2 me

 

8:32 _i’m playing a game. talk to koutarou_

 

8:32 he’s on his date w akaashi

8:35 kenma pls

8:35 i’m dying

 

8:40 _go out somewhere. go to a party or something. you love parties._

 

8:41 oh

8:41 omg it’s friday

8:42 ok i’ll go out thank u

 

* * *

 

 

10:46 kennma!!!

10:46 heyy gues wat

10:47 !!!

 

10:48 _am i imagining things or is your spelling even worse than its usual?_

 

10:50 guss who i jus saw!

10:51 ur not guessin!!

10:51 ken ma!

 

10:52 _who, kuroo?_

 

10:53 ur not fun omg

10:54 bad guessr but its tsukishshjja!! from karsssno. hes here lol

10:55 idk y hes herre but! he is!

 

10:56 _that’s nice_

10:57 _you’re enjoying the party, i assume._

 

10:58 yea!!

10:58 waitt thats not tsukkk its just a tall guy :///

 

10:58 _maybe you should enjoy the party more and let me go play my game._

 

11:00 ok!

 

* * *

 

 

12:24 oh no ugh i did NOTT WANa c that

12:24 kenma i got hom e n gues wat!

 

12:25 _i’m really not in the mood to guess again_

 

12:26 ok but akaashii n bo were gettin it on n i!! idk wat 2 do!! im freakin out kenma what do i do

 

12:27 _they were what?_

 

12:28 idk exactlyy but there was nott a lot o clothes!! in my dorm room!

 

12:30 _oh. well, the date went well._

 

12:31 kenma!

 

12:32 _can’t you go ask daichi if you can stay the night?_

 

12:33 butt hes in the other dorm n its so cold

12:34 i dont wanna go outside knma

 

12:35 _maybe keiji and koutarou will be done soon?_

12:35 _i’m not exactly sure how to help you. this is a weird situation, kuroo._

 

12:36 y dont u call me tettsuruo

 

12:37 _you didn’t even spell your name right_

 

12:38 kenma im srs

12:39 u call them by their first naems n not me?

12:40 u nvr hav

 

12:42 _kuroo you’re drunk_

 

12:43 ok and??

12:43 im also cold n wanna sleep but bo is currently FUCKIN HIS SETTER

12:44 THATT IS A MINOR BO

12:44 V CONCERNNING

 

12:45 _you two are only one year older than keiji. it’s not that big of a deal._

 

12:46 yea but thats like bo n u!!

12:47 like excus me?? no one gets 2 touch u!

 

12:48 _kuroo please just go find somewhere to sleep. it’s one in the morning, you can’t just stay in the hallway_

 

12:49 did u say yes 2 tht guy? the one who asked u out? bc ill hurt him if he touches u bad or does smthn mean or makes u sad

12:50 no one gets to hurt you

 

12:56 _i called daichi. he’s coming to get you, and he’s bringing a coat. you should text me when you get back to his place, okay?_

 

12:57 did u say yes

 

12:58 _text me when you get there._

 

* * *

 

 

1:11 daichhi is nice

 

1:12 _warm?_

 

1:13 yes

1:14 my head will hurt tmrw

 

1:15 _i know. drink water. i’ll talk to you tomorrow._

 

1:16 ok. im sorry. goodnihgt

 

1:25 _goodnight tetsurou_

 

* * *

 

 

** _Saturday, December 10th_ **

11:30 _are you alive_?

 

11:35 i rly hate myself

 

11:36 _i’ll take that as a yes. are you drinking lots of water? did you eat?_

 

11:37 u r like the last person who should be mothering me rn

11:38 i spent all morning w sawamura

11:38 he’s such a DAD omg

 

11:40 _just trying to care_

 

11:41 ik i’m sorry

11:42 i had like 8 gallons of water which made me have 2 get up n piss like 20 times this morning

11:43 n sawamura brought back some bagels after his morning classes

11:43 who tf actually takes morning classes

11:44 sawamura’s a fuckin 45yo man i s2g

 

11:45 _at least he let you sleep in his dorm_

 

11:47 ik

11:47 he’s gr8

11:48 but wow bo i’m happy 4 u n all but thx so much for the warning

 

11:50 _keiji must be happy_

 

11:51 what do u mean

 

11:52 _he was really excited to visit koutarou. he talked about it a lot, actually. the second years are all either really confused or really annoyed._

 

11:53 holy shit

11:54 wow so both of em r whipped

 

11:55 _you act like that’s a bad thing_

 

11:56 it’s not!! it’s v cute. i’m happy 4 them.

 

11:57 _me too_

 

* * *

 

 

5:56 omg i thought of a joke

5:57 so a woodpecker goes to visit an owl n he says ‘knock knock’

5:59 (u hav to go next)

 

6:03 _who’s there?_

 

6:04 HAHA

6:05 GET IT? IT’S AN OWL

6:05 i got u so good

6:05 tell me how my ass tastes

 

6:06 _you should tell koutarou that one. he might actually laugh_

 

6:07 first of all, mean

6:08 second of all, i already did n he almost died cuz he laughed n then he fell off his bed n almost hit his head on the dresser

 

6:10 _is he okay?_

 

6:11 ye u know bo, he’s got a skull made of iron apparently

 

6:12 _i need to talk to you later, if that’s alright_

 

6:15 wat is this oddity!!

6:15 is kenma busy?

 

6:17 _yes_

 

6:18 wow hav fun w whatever ur doing ;))))

6:18 ur probably grocery shopping cuz ur mom made u go out but

6:18 have fun!!

 

* * *

 

 

1:34 _i think i messed up_


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which everyone knows exactly what's going on

** _Sunday, December 11th_ **

8:21 i was sleeping i’m sorry but omg kenma what happened? r u okay??

8:23 i kno u like to sleep in but when u wake up pls text me i am worried

 

8:26 _it’s okay, i’m awake_

 

8:27 what happened??

 

8:28 _it’s not that big of a deal, kuroo. honestly. i just messed up a little bit._

8:28 _i went on my date yesterday_

 

8:30 oh

8:31 did he do smthn to u??

 

8:32 _no_

8:33 _he was really nice and polite and didn’t do anything wrong_

 

8:35 ok then what’s wrong?

 

8:40 _what if someone kissed you but you couldn’t stop thinking about someone else? would that make you a bad person?_

 

8:41 oh god, kenma, no. ur not a bad person. even if u like someone else. u just gotta tell him, ok? but it’s not ur fault if u like someone else, especially if u didn’t realize before he kissed u

8:43 wait

8:43 he was ur first kiss??

 

8:44 _yes_

 

8:45 wtff 

8:47 wait

8:47 u like someone else??

 

8:48 _yes_

 

8:49 who???

8:55 kenma i must know these things don’t b vague

 

8:56 _don’t worry about it, kuroo_

 

8:57 no?

8:57 u can’t just not tell me these things

8:57 i’m ur best friend

 

9:00 _i know_

9:02 _you’re my best friend_

 

9:03 ok so??

 

9:04 _i have to go somewhere now. i will talk to you later_

 

9:05 jfc i can’t believe you

9:06 u can’t just DO THAT omg

 

* * *

 

 

12:05 kenma i’m srs rn pls talk 2 me

 

* * *

 

 

3:56 ok srsly did i do smthn wrong??

3:56 u r like never busy so i feel like u r avoiding me

3:59 kenma pls just tell me what i did

4:00 am i not being supportive enough??

4:00 u kno i try when it comes to these things but u kno i suck at it sometimes

4:01 if u still feel like a bad person, i’m being srs. it doesn’t matter, u just gotta tell the guy, ok? if he’s nice enough, he won’t mind that u like someone else. and if not, fuck him, no  one cares what he thinks if he doesn’t validate ur opinion

 

* * *

 

 

5:02 ok u kno what? i’m gonna drop it. i won’t ask who u like anymore, ok? u can tell me whenever ur ready

5:03 i do think u should go after whoever it is, if u think they’ll make u happy

5:03 u kno i just want u 2 be happy, right?

 

* * *

 

 

7:45 ok but was it a good first kiss??

7:45 that i must kno

 

8:04 _does it matter if it was a good first kiss?_

 

8:05 WTF

8:05 /NOW/ U REPLY??

8:05 KENMA R U SRS

 

8:06 _kuroo, calm down. shouyou came to visit me today, and i was spending the day with him. alright?_

 

8:07 o ok i like shrimpy

8:08 did u hav fun? :)

 

8:09 _yes, he actually brought his playstation for us to play on.apparently karasuno’s libero and one of their wing spikers have accounts, so the four of us played online_

 

8:10 ooh, v exciting, did u win?

 

8:10 _of course_

 

8:11 that’s my boy

8:11 uh

8:11 i mean, like, good job

8:12 *thumbs up*

8:12 u destroyed them i bet hahah

8:12 ANYWAYS STOP DISTRACTING ME

8:12 we were talking about ur first kiss!!

 

8:13 _what is there to be talked about?_

8:13 _additionally, are you okay over there?_

 

8:14 what is there not 2 b talked about!!1!

8:14 kenma ur first kiss is a big deal

 

8:15 _i can see how my first kiss could be a big deal to me, maybe. but to you, on the other hand… i’m having a bit of a hard time seeing how relevant it is_

 

8:16 uh, duh? bc best friends tell each other everything?

8:16 (i mean, u won’t tell me who u do like, n i’m kinda salty about that, but i’m letting it go, remember? letting it go)

8:17 so u gotta give me the details!

 

8:18 _well you never told me about your first kiss, did you?_

 

8:18 ok but that doesn’t count bc bo told u anyways

8:18 it’s embarrassing kenma shut up i don’t wanna remember that 

 

8:19 _what was it again?_

8:20 _was it…yaku…in a broom closet? because you thought he was the class rep coming in to respond to your confession? the confession that you happened to leave in icing on a peanut butter cookie? the same peanut butter cookie that gave the class rep an allergic reaction and made her hospitalized? which is what yaku was going into the closet to tell you about in the first place, when you kissed him? and not even an innocent peck, but a full-out gross wet one thanks to all that ecchi manga that you didn’t think i knew you were reading?_

 

8:21 KENMA

8:21 I

8:21 I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS

8:21 KO

8:21 ZU

8:21 ME

8:21 KEN

8:21 MA

8:22 U HAD NO RIGHT

8:22 STOP THIS I HATE THIS I HATE U OMG

8:22 I’M SCREAMING

 

8:23 _needless to say, i don’t know why first kisses are a big deal_

8:24 _also, at least you’re finally out of the closet now_

 

8:25 ur such a little shit

8:25 i hav no idea y people think u r nice

8:26 UGH i still hav nightmares about that whole experience

8:26 it’s a wonder i’m a normal functioning human now

 

8:27 _well, i don’t know if i’d go that far_

 

8:28 ok u kno what

8:28 i’m gonna drop this discussion

8:28 n ur gonna tell me about this kiss

 

8:29 _i don’t really know what to tell_

8:30 _it was nice, i guess_

8:30 _not especially romantic, which is what i think he was going for, but i didn’t really have high hopes for romance anyways_

 

8:31 well where was it?

 

8:32 _we went for a walk in this park and there were fairy lights in the trees so he just, i don’t know. he kissed me. it was nice, i guess i just kind of wanted there to be fireworks, or whatever._

8:32 _that probably sounds stupid_

 

8:33 no no no

8:33 that’s nvr stupid

8:33 fireworks r v important!!

 

8:34 _i know, it’s just. i knew there wouldn’t be fireworks going into it, but i still let it happen. so it’s kind of stupid. i could’ve just waited, it’s not like kissing someone was a really big deal to me anyways._

 

8:34 then y…?

 

8:35 _because he wanted to, and i supposed i didn’t mind._

8:35 _at least he didn’t shove his tongue down my throat like a certain someone i know_

 

8:35 ok u kno what

8:36 all these yrs of being ur best friend and this is what i get in return

8:36 smh

8:36 ur a cruel man, kenma. a cruel man indeed.

 

8:37 _so i’ve been told_

 

8:37 wat really?? who said that? i’ll fight them!

 

8:38 _literally only you, but i appreciate the concern._

 

8:38 oh

8:38 :^)

8:38 oh shit

 

8:39 _everything ok…?_

 

8:40 bo just txted me saying he caught the kitchen on fire so i gtg

 

8:41 _ok, good luck_

 

* * *

 

 

** _Monday, December 12th_ **

8:52 **HEY HEY HEY!!!**

 

8:53 _hello koutarou_

 

8:53 bo wtf i’m sitting right next 2 u, y is this necessary

 

8:54 **because i need hellp! and u two are like some of mmy best friends ever??**

 

8:55 aw i’m touched

 

8:56 _what do you need help with?_

 

8:57 **i need to get akaashi a presentt for christmas and idk whhat to get him ahaha**

 

8:58 what about ur d

 

8:59 **hahahaha!!**

8:59 **i need a present to go with that tho**

 

9:01 _don’t you know keiji better than anyone?_

 

9:02 **no haha hhe’s so quiet!! i’m sure there’s someeone who knows more about him tthan me**

 

9:03 kenma r u gonna tell him

 

9:04 **tell me whatt??**

9:04 **wait did akaashi say somethin about me?**

 

9:05 _you understand him better than anyone else.at least, that’s what he told me._

 

9:06 **:OOOOO :DDDD**

 

9:07 u 2 r relationships goals tbh

9:07 cutest couple i kno

 

9:08 **haha thankks but what about u two?**

 

9:09 wait wat

 

9:10 _what do you mean?_

 

9:11 **oh hahah never mind!! ok so gift ideaas anyone?**

 

9:12 wait a second

9:13 i’m missing smthn

9:14 u…

 

9:14 **…haha?**

 

9:15 ur only getting akaashi a gift?!

 

9:16 **bro i would never**

9:16 **of course i’m getting u a gift**

9:17 **u know how much i love u**

 

9:18 bo, idk what to say

9:18 u r my gift

 

9:19 **!!!!!! that wass so good!!!!**

 

9:20 _so do you two need a moment or…?_

 

9:21 holy shit

9:21 this is a group chat

 

9:22 **wait right it’s a group chat**

 

9:22 _if i’m being completely honest here, i’m sort of surprised that you’re actually planning this far in advance for getting him a present_

 

9:22 **:DD thankks!!!**

9:23 **wait..**

 

9:23 bro lmao

 

9:23 **kenma am i supposedd to be insulted??**

 

9:24 _i mean, not necessarily_

 

9:24 let it be known that kenma kozume is a cruel guy

 

9:25 **wait okk if kenma gets to be cruel guy..can i be cool guy???**

 

9:25 who is that?

 

9:25 **OMGGG**

 

9:25 _oh no_

 

9:25 [**https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4txVqr1eNwc**](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4txVqr1eNwc)

 

9:27 that

9:27 was the most beautiful thing

9:27 i hav ever seen

 

9:28 **RIGHT???**

9:28 **cool guy iss an inspiratoin to everyone!!!**

 

9:29 ok yes bo u can b cool guy and kenma can b cruel guy

 

9:29 _do i get a say in this?_

 

9:29 but then what am i??

 

9:29 **u can be hot guy ;))))**

 

9:29 no kenma ur cruel gay u can’t say anything

9:29 ***guy

9:30 omg bo i love it

 

9:30 _how about kuroo is nerd guy_

 

9:30 no??

 

9:30 **yes!!**

 

9:30 nO?????

 

9:31 **yES!!!!!!!**

9:31 **kuroo i love that one for u :)**

9:31 **mr. college prep class**

 

9:32 ok u kno what

9:32 i came out to have a good time

 

9:32 _that’s really old, kuroo_

 

9:32 and i’m honestly feelin so attacked rn

9:32 ok kenma r u the king of memes or something

 

9:33 **meme guy**

 

9:33 ^^

 

9:34 _i just thought you’d have better material, for someone who supposedly knows all of the memes_

 

9:34 **bro**

9:34 **i think thatt was a challenge**

9:35 **he’s challenging u**

9:35 **to a MEME WAR!!!!**

 

9:35 _i’m really not_

 

9:36 ye bro i appreciate the thought but i’m pretty sure kenma would actually beat me so that’s a bad idea :^/

 

9:37 **ur conceding defeat???**

 

9:37 tbh ya lmao

 

9:37 _he’s not that dumb_

 

9:37 thx kenma ur nice sometimes :^)

9:37 bo if ur going to the kitchen can u get me some pringles

 

9:38 **ya no problem!!**

 

9:38 thx ily

 

9:38 **i know ;)))**

 

9:38 ;^)

 

9:38 **;)))**

9:38 **do u want barbecuue or sourr cream and onion?**

 

9:39 sour cream n onion pls

 

9:40 **:OOO omg ur lucky this is the last can**

 

9:40 o thank god

 

9:41 _i don’t mean to break anything up, but have you decided on a present yet, koutarou?_

 

9:42 thx for bringing me pringles bro

9:42 oh shit lol ^^

 

9:43 **ahhh no i forrgot!!**

 

9:43 _that was the entire purpose of this group message_

 

9:43 **ya ok truu but!! im really nervous DDD:**

9:43 **i dontt wanna get hiim somethin stupidd and hav him hate me!!**

 

9:43 aw bro no

 

9:44 _do you really think keiji could hate you?_

 

9:44 ya^^ srsly bro u guys r like meant 2 b

9:44 u’ll b together forever n then before we kno it, kenma n i will b getting invites to ur wedding

9:44 ‘mr. n mr. bokuto’

9:44 wait

9:45 ‘mr. n mr. akaashi’??

 

9:45 _i think both sound good, don’t you?_

9:45 _and i have to agree with kuroo. you two have always been really good together. you know each other better than anyone and i think you two complement each other well_

 

9:46 uh bro?

9:46 omg kenma i think he’s short-circuiting

9:46 he’s just staring at the wall lmao

9:47 hold on bro i gotchu

 

9:48 **im alrright!!!**

9:48 **i just**

9:48 **i wantt akaashi’s name because its so prettty!! :DD**

9:48 **omg we’re gonna hav litttle babyy akaashis!!!!! they're gonna be so pretty!!**

 

9:49 i dig the enthusiasm bro but it’s also only been like 4 days

9:49 im gonna go pee so brb

 

9:49 **five!!**

9:49 **andd hav fun bro :))**

 

9:49 _five days is kind of irrelevant when they’ve been together for essentially two years at this point_

9:50 _i mean, they practically acted together all this time_

 

9:51 **ya haha kinda like u and kuroo :’)))**

 

9:51 _what do you mean?_

 

9:52 **like dontt u think u two act kinda together?? i always thought so lol, before i kneww u two. so diid the resst of fukurodani**

 

9:53 _how so?_

 

9:53 **idkk u guys r just always together n u know eacch other better than anyone so it jusst makes sense, yknow!!! :)**

 

9:54 _um, well_

 

9:54 alRIGHT I’M BACK FROM THE BATHROOM

9:54 thx :) bo :) but :) shut :) up :)

9:54 don’t listen 2 him kenma, he thinks he knos everything bc he’s in a gr8 relationship

9:54 but he doesn’t kno anything about our friendship!!

 

9:55 _right_

 

9:55 **rude DDD:**

 

9:57 _alright, well, before i go to beat this game, i think we should decide on a gift, right?_

 

9:57 yea lets do that!

 

9:57 _i think you should make him something, because he really likes your personality and he clearly liked the last gift you got him, right?_

 

9:58 **omg righht!! he did!!**

9:58 **so i just hav to makee him something!!**

9:59 **thats…ok i hav no ideas**

 

9:59 wat about like a poem?

9:59 o o make him his fav food!

 

9:59 **i shoulld make him boiled rapeseed? DD:**

 

10:00 wait wtf is that rly his fav food

 

10:00 _that’s not…really…his favorite food, is it?_

 

10:00 ^^

 

10:00 **it really is!!!**

 

10:01 _i, um. you’re serious?_

 

10:01 kenma doesn’t like vegetables so this is probably stressin him out, bo. next idea!

 

10:01 **next idea!!**

 

10:05 so that was a lot of thinking n it’s a bit 2 much 4 me

 

10:05 **yeaa……..**

10:05 **i suck im such a bad boyyfriend i cant evenn think of something to gett him for christmas ))))))’:**

 

10:05 _that’s not true. keiji likes you very much, present or not_

 

10:05 no no no bo ur gr8!!

10:05 (what kenma said ^^)

 

10:06 _besides, we still have plenty of time to figure it out_

 

10:06 ya we’re with u bo

10:06 we’ll keep helping u!

 

10:06 **thank u i lovee u guys :))))**

 

10:06 ily u too bro :’)

 

10:06 _i love you both as well_

 

10:06 **^^:)))))**

 

10:06 ??

 

10:07 **:))))))))))!!!)))**

 

10:07 ??????

 

10:08 _ok, well this conversation is nice and all, but i’m going to go beat my game. i encourage you to not text me because if i get distracted and lose…_

 

10:08 **DDDDDD:**

 

10:08 DDDDDD^:

 

* * *

 

 

12:32 i’m checkin in quite hesitantly bc i’m low-key afraid of u when u lose a game but

12:32 did u win :^)

 

12:34 _yes, actually_

12:34 _and thank god for that. the last level took forever._

 

12:35 eyyyyy atta boy

12:35 good job

 

12:35 _you’re not using the group chat?_

 

12:36 nah that’s just for christmas planning i think

12:36 bo n i txt a lot more than that irl but i told him how much u don’t like being spammed w notifications

12:36 (plus he’s asleep n bo def needs his beauty sleep if he’s gonna keep up w akaashi)

 

12:37 _thank you_

 

12:38 np

12:38 but i’m also here to make sure u go 2 bed 

12:38 get some sleep 

 

12:39 _alright, goodnight_

 

12:40 gn kenma

 

* * *

 

 

** _Tuesday, December 13th_ **

2:32 _hey can you send me a picture of that face i hate?_

 

2:33 Image attached.

2:33 this one?

 

2:34 _no, the other one_

2:34 _the cat mouth one_

 

2:35 Image attached.

2:35 ?

 

2:36 _yes thank you_

 

2:37 np

2:38 wait

2:38 aren’t u at school rn

2:38 y do u need that picture

2:40 keNMA

 

3:06 _we were showing the new first years who the captain that brought us to nationals was_

 

3:15 then Y DID U SHOW THEM THAT ONE

3:15 that’s the face u hate!!

3:16 y couldn’t u have shown them 1 where i look hot like i usually do

3:16 like this one

3:17 Image attached.

3:17 do u see how nice i look there??? 

3:18 (that's a new sweater bo bought me btw)

 

3:19 _showing them a picture where you look good wouldn’t have been embarrassing enough_

3:19 _(and it looks nice, btw)_

 

3:20 well it worked

3:20 thx a lot

3:20 idek these kids but i’m already feelin the embarrassment smh

3:20 (also thx :^))

 

3:21 _they’re nice kids_

3:21 _one of them is a bit dumb, however_

 

3:22 wait y, what did they do

 

3:23 _they have a slightly (painfully) obvious crush on lev?_

3:23 _i’m not sure by what standards they find people attractive_

3:24 _the whole situation is rather confusing_

 

3:24 wait wait wait

3:25 they like LEV?

3:25 lev.

3:25 is this the same lev who was on the team last year

 

3:26 _yes_

 

3:27 wtf

3:27 r u sure

 

3:28 _yes_

 

3:28 ok wtf

3:28 they like lev

3:28 who actually does that

 

3:29 _one of your best friends…?_

 

3:30 wait wtf YOU LIKE LEV??

 

3:30 _what? no._

3:31 _kuroo, i’m talking about yaku._

 

3:31 oh

3:31 wait what do u mean ‘yaku’

 

3:32 _yaku likes lev?_

3:33 _they’re dating?_

 

3:34 THEY’RE DATING??

 

3:35 _where have you been?_

 

3:35 the void apparently

3:35 how tf did i kno none of this??

3:35 that’s like good? or. huh. idk how i feel about this actually. that’s so /weird/. lev and yaku? lev…and yaku. 

3:36 wait when did they start dating?

 

3:37 _last year, before the end of the tournament_

 

3:38 WHAT

3:38 HOW DID I NOT NOTICE

 

3:39 _i genuinely do not know_

3:39 _we caught them both half-naked in the locker room one time_

 

3:40 i thought they were just massaging each other!!

 

3:41 _they…_

3:41 _kuroo…_

 

3:42 omg this is insane

 

3:43 _it’s really not that big of a deal. they’re happy together. yaku visits quite frequently, and he helps out with practice sometimes. the first years all love him, and lev is always in a great mood after he visits, so it helps._

 

3:44 that’s really cute, first of all

3:44 but that’s not rly what i meant

3:45 i mean, like

3:45 all of my friends r here falling in love and i’m just??? like bo n akaashi found each other. n now i find out that lev n yaku have /been/ together 4 a while. n you’ve got ur crush on whoever.n it’s just like. what am i doing?

 

3:46 _you don’t have anyone you like?_

 

3:48 i mean

3:48 that’s kind of irrelevant

 

3:49 _how so?_

 

3:50 impossible things don’t count

 

3:51 _and how do you know it’s impossible?_

 

3:51 bc it is??

3:51 u kno like. idk how 2 explain it.

 

3:52 _try me?_

 

3:52 alright so homeostasis n all that. like the body’s tendency to want to remain the same? that’s what it’s like.

 

3:53 _you’re saying it’s impossible because it’s too much change?_

3:53 _is this because you’ve never kept a relationship for long? so now starting one seems weird?_

 

3:54 ya sure

3:54 smthn like that

3:55 it’s just always been a certain way n now i’m scared to change it

3:55 bc what it is now…is rly nice

 

3:56 _well you’ve had your fair share of bad relationships, so it’s ok to be nervous and everything. but that doesn’t mean you should stop trying for any relationships in the future, you know?_

 

3:57 ik ik

3:58 just rly rly rly don’t wanna fuck things up lmao

3:58 which, let’s b honest, i hav a slight tendency 2 do

 

3:59 _no, you don’t_

3:59 _and listen, i’ll talk to you later, okay? we have practice._

 

4:00 ok yea

 

* * *

 

 

6:02 _kuroo!!!!!_

 

6:03 what the fuck

 

6:03 _lol it’s me!!!!!!_

 

6:04 who the fuck

 

6:05 _DID YOU MISS US KUROO-SAN_

 

6:06 i’m

6:06 ok srsly wtf

 

6:07 _WE MISSED YOU LOTS_

6:07 _WE WANTED TO SA_

6:07 _i have the phone back now!!!!!_

 

6:08 WHERE IS KENMA

 

6:08 _he’s in the locker room changing!!!!_

6:08 _we got his phone!!!!_

6:08 _i’m lev!!!!_

6:08 _I’M INUOKA I’M HERE TOO_

6:08 _(￣︿￣)_

6:09 _THAT’S FUKUNAGA DID YOU MISS HIM TOO_

 

6:10 omg u guys

6:10 kenma’s gonna kill u lmao

 

6:11 _no he won’t!!!!_

6:11 _yamamoto-san is distracting him!!!_

6:12 _LEV USES TOO MANY EXCLAMATION POINTS DON’T YOU THINK KUROO-SAN_

6:12 _(─‿‿─)_

6:12 _HAHA FUKUNAGA IS LAUGHING AT A JOKE BUT HE WON’T TELL US WHAT IT IS_

6:12 _he’s so funny!!!_

 

6:12 ok as nice as it is 2 talk 2 u all

6:12 can maybe 1 person txt me at a time

 

6:13 _sure it’ll be me!!!! because you miss me most don’t you???_

 

6:14 sure we’ll go w that

6:14 so how r things w yaku, kid? bc apparently ur dating which i didn't kno until yesterday

 

6:15 _they’re very great!!! i enjoy my time with him lots!!_

 

6:15 aw

6:15 so who tops

 

6:15 _actually it’s_

6:16 _I’m sorry about all this. I was against the whole idea of them stealing Kenma’s phone but apparently they don’t have your number, and they really wanted to talk to you, so they outnumbered me. (It’s Shibayama, by the way.)_

6:16 _(｀⌒*)O-(｀⌒´Q)_

6:17 _Fukunaga-san is saying that the captain is going to kill all of them once he gets past Yamamoto-san._

 

6:18 yeah he will lmao

6:18 kenma hates ppl touching his phone

 

6:19 _In that case, I’m going to hand this back to Fukunaga-san and leave the room._

 

6:19 u do that bud

 

6:20 _(－‸ლ)_

 

6:20 ikr they’re rly stupid

6:20 kenma’s gonna slaughter them

 

6:21 _Image attached._

6:21 _ヽ(￣д￣;)ノ=3=3=3_

 

6:21 did

6:21 is that a picture of kenma changing

6:21 fukunaga

6:22 i

6:22 um

6:24 FUKUNAGA

6:24 EXPLAIN THIS

 

* * *

 

 

7:48 _they’re all dead to me._

 

7:49 me 2, buddy. me 2.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> poor kuroo, he's an angsty soul

_ **Wednesday, December 14th** _

9:42 hey best friend who loves me more than anything and would do anything for me

 

9:45 _what do you want_

 

9:46 do u wanna text akaashi 4 me bc bo is freaking out

 

9:46 _why is he freaking out_

 

9:47 akaashi isn’t replying 2 his txts n we were watchin this one detective thriller n now he thinks akaashi was kidnapped or is in the hospital or smthn

 

9:48 _you do realize that both keiji and i are in school right now, right?_

 

9:49 well

9:49 uh

9:49 can u just do it pls he’s freaking out

 

9:51 _fine_

 

9:51 _if my teacher takes my phone, it’s your fault_

 

9:52 thank u ily

 

9:53 _prove it_

 

9:54 hahaha uh what do u mean

9:54 i’m so far away haha

 

9:55 _i was just messing with you. i’m texting keiji now_

 

9:56 right. gotcha

 

* * *

 

 

10:25 _he was taking a test. please tell koutarou to calm down_

 

10:28 o thank god

10:29 (apparently they were talkin bout smthn important n akaashi suddenly went mia so that’s y he was worried)

10:29 i feel like a marriage counselor

 

10:30 _please never become a marriage counselor, you’d get way too involved in their lives_

 

10:31 isn’t that what a marriage counselor is supposed 2 do?

 

10:32 _no, i mean. you’d probably go home with the couple and go on dates with them and demand to know every little detail. it’d be frightening_

 

10:33 idk if i should b offended or flattered that u kno me so well

10:34 anyways i’ll let u do ur school thing

 

10:35 _thank you_

 

* * *

 

1:34 **so did thiis group chat die or??**

 

1:37 bro kenma is gonna kill u

1:37 he’s @ school rn don’t txt him

 

1:38 _kuroo, you text me while i’m at school all the time_

 

1:39 it’s not my fault!

 

1:40 **bro it’s kindda ur fault**

1:40 **thanks for helping mee with akaashi, kenma!!!**

 

1:41 _no problem. i still don’t think you should worry too much about him, though. he cares about you_

1:41 _also we are at school. so you still shouldn’t be texting us_

 

1:42 c bo what did i say?

 

1:43 **ur still texting him too!!!**

 

1:44 i’ll stop if u stop!

 

1:44 **ok then i’ll stop!!**

 

1:44 alright then stop!

 

1:45 **fine!!**

 

1:45 _it’s okay, you know. i’m not doing much right now, i already finished my work._

 

1:46 then i won’t stop!

 

1:46 **me either!!**

 

1:47 _i don’t mind so long as this has a point_

 

1:48 **akaashi still needss a christmas present DDD:**

 

1:49 _you still don’t have any ideas?_

 

1:49 **no i’m awful i’m terrible ))):**

 

1:50 bro no! ur awesome n amazing

1:50 ok what if

1:51 what if u got him a pet cat!

1:52 cats r adorable, everyone loves cats

 

1:52 **yeah!!!**

 

1:52 _keiji is allergic to cats_

 

1:53 **no!!**

 

1:53 ok well i tried. didn’t i try?

 

1:54 **yes u trieed and it was very mucch apprecaited!! thank u bro**

 

1:54 no prob

1:55 i promise we’ll think of smthn, it might just take a while ok?

 

1:56 **dontt worry! we’ll figure it out :)))**

 

1:57 _you were the only one worrying, koutarou_

 

1:57 **well i’m okay now!**

 

1:58 bro that’s gr8, i’m v proud of u

 

1:58 **thanks :)))**

1:58 **so anymore ideas??**

 

1:59 _my next class is starting so i have to go. we can figure it out later_

 

2:00 **byee kenma!!! kuroo will miss you ;)))))**

 

2:00 brO STFU

2:00 y do u have to do that??

 

2:01 **im helping!!**

 

2:01 nO ur not!

2:01 kenma ignore him

2:02 he’s just a dumb bird

 

2:03 **; >>>>**

2:03 **(slightly offendded but thats okayy!)**

2:04 ( **because im being helpfful)**

 

2:05 (haha stfu)

 

2:06 _stop texting me, both of you_

 

2:06 **got it!**

 

2:06 got it!

 

* * *

 

 

5:45 _Image attached._

5:45 _tubbs is sleeping on that hoodie you left here_

 

5:47 !!! i forgot u found that cat. she’s so cute wtf

5:48 also y is that hoodie on ur bed, i keep all the stuff i leave at ur house in that one drawer in ur dresser

5:49 wait

5:49 kenma r u wearing my stuff???

 

5:50 _it’s comfortable_

 

5:51 holy shit i thought u were just gonna ignore me but ok

 

5:52 _no? what’s wrong with wearing your stuff? it’s not like you’re going to need it relatively soon. i’ll wash it before i return it, if that’s what you’re concerned about._

 

5:54 i’m, uh, not actually concerned at all haha

5:54 just surprised

5:55 i totally forgot about all that stuff!

5:55 but u can def def wear it!

5:55 if u want, i mean

 

5:56 _i know. you left maybe three shirts, a pair of sweatpants, and that hoodie. i can bring them when i visit, if you’d like_

 

5:56 no!

5:57 i mean, if u find them comfortable, then wear them

5:57 not a problem

5:57 um, what shirts are they again?

 

5:58 _Image attached._

 

5:59 oh ur wearing one

5:59 i like that one

 

6:00 _are you sure you don’t want them back?_

 

6:01 yeah i’m v sure

6:01 i have 2 go bc i have practice n then a team dinner

6:02 so i’ll talk 2 u tmrw?

 

6:03 _alright, have fun_

 

* * *

 

_ **Thursday, December 15th** _

12:45 Imaged attached.

12:45 look who it is! me n my fav asshole oikawa

 

12:47 _you can tell him hello for me. are you guys getting lunch?_

 

12:47 getting fro yo cuz he rly fucking loves fro yo 4 some reason? idk

12:47 his bf is here 2

12:48 (he’s visiting from his university bc he cares. can u believe that? unlike someone who hasn’t visited me yet..)

 

12:49 _you’re being melodramatic. i’m visiting soon._

12:49 _is his boyfriend the spiker from aoba johsai?_

 

12:50 ik ik sorry

12:50 and ya how’d u kno

 

12:50 _lucky guess_

 

12: 52 hi kuroo’s boyfriend!!! xoxoxo

12:52 wtf n this is y he’s called shittykawa

12:52 ignore that

 

12:53 _ignoring that._

 

12:53 thx he’s just mad bc i like texting u more than i like paying attention to him

12:53 what a gossipy bitch smh

 

12:54 _you’re kind of a gossipy bitch, too_

 

12:54 ok rude

12:55 also kenma wtf watch ur language

 

12:55 _you’re not my mom, kuroo_

 

12:56 ok this is weird, oikawa n his bf are like having this exact same convo rn n it’s kinda freaking m out

12:56 ’iwa-chan r u my mom’

12:57 how tf has this guy not broken up w him already

 

12:58 _i suppose i understand how he feels, having to put up with someone so dramatic all the time_

 

12:58 kenma! i am offended :^(

12:58 also ik i complain about u calling me kuroo instead of tetsurou but at least u don’t call me fuckin ‘kuroo-chan’

12:58 gag me w a spoon, dude

 

12:59 _what was that, kuroo-chan?_

 

12:59 NO

12:59 NO MORE

 

12:59 _you’re right. i hate that. i’m never saying that again._

 

1:00 i need to go breathe 4 a bit. that was nightmare fuel right there. the scariest thing i’ve ever heard u say tbh

 

1:00 _my lunch is over. text you later?_

 

1:01 alright ya ttyl

 

* * *

 

 

7:50 hey can u say smthn 2 cheer me up

 

7:57 _what’s wrong?_

 

7:58 this one class is kickin my ass n i need a study break or im gonna scream. we’ve got an exam tmrw bc the prof is shit n wants to make it early n no matter what i do, i feel like none of the info is stickin w me. i rly need to do well on this exam bc i wanna keep my spot on the team, yknow? but it’s like nothin is fuckin working

8:00 it doesn’t matter what it is. just smthn 2 distract me or whatever. can u just talk so i can listen 2 u?

 

8:01 _alright._

8:02 _you know your mom came over for dinner today?_

 

8:02 did she? i miss her. what did u guys talk about?

 

8:03 _we talked about school, and she and my mom talked about work. she kept telling me how much you miss me, you know_

 

8:04 smh she’s such a snitch

 

8:05 _i’m sure she is. you have to take after someone, after all. i’m glad you call her, though. she misses you too. we all do._

 

8:06 :)

8:06 well i’m only in college, i’m not dead, so. it won’t be that much longer till we can all hang out again

 

8:07 _i know_

 

8:07 how much longer till u come?

 

8:08 _a little over a week_

 

8:08 too long

 

8:10 _i know_

8:11 _your mom brought a photo album to give to me and my mom_

8:11 _Image attached._

 

8:12 omg is that me n u

 

8:13 _yes, remember that time when you fell out of the tree house? this is after you got your arm cast_

 

8:14 i remember!! n u told everyone to go sign my cast or u wouldn’t share ur new video game w them

 

8:15 _i did not_

 

8:15 did too!! i remember v clearly, kenma, don’t doubt me

 

8:16 _hm. whatever._

8:16 _Image attached._

8:16 _remember this?_

 

8:18 that’s the time u thought u could bake ur own apple pie!! n so u made me help n then my mom came home to find the entire kitchen trashed w like three apples shoved down the toilet cuz we thought we could hide the entire thing if we got rid of the apples

 

8:19 _that was your idea, not mine_

 

8:20 no way that was 100% ur idea. n u got so upset over the idea of getting in trouble that u wouldn’t stop crying until i got u a pie

 

8:20 _you were the one crying, kuroo_

 

8:20 was not!!

 

8:21 _you were always the one crying. you cried all the time as a kid._

 

8:21 did not!

 

8:24 _Image attached._

8:24 _Image attached._

8:24 _Image attached_.

 

8:25 oh

8:25 ok well those don’t count

8:26 i specifically remember u crying one time bc u thought i drowned when i was trying to catch a frog 4 my fish tank

 

8:27 _Image attached._

8:27 _you mean this time? it was a turtle. and i thought you died, of course i would cry._

 

8:28 ohhhh right a turtle!! omg u look so cute

8:29 i’m a weird-looking kid wtf

 

8:29 _you look the same as you do now_

 

8:30 wow rude

 

8:31 _i’m saying you look fine then and now_

 

8:31 just fine? or fiiiiiine? ;^)

 

8:33 _ignoring that._

8:33 _Image attached._

 

8:34 omg that’s cute

8:34 wait send me a picture of the photo to the left of that one

 

8:35 _Image attached._

8:35 _this one?_

 

8:36 !!!!! kenma look we’re holding hands!!!

8:36 that’s the cutest thing i’ve ever seen omg

8:37 i’m gonna make that my background

 

8:38 _don’t do that_

 

8:39 y not??? it’s so cute!

 

8:39 _yes but what if someone gets the wrong idea?_

 

8:40 like what? kenma u should make ur background a pic of us 2!

 

8:40 _never mind._

8:42 _my background already is a picture of us_

 

8:42 omg wat show me

 

8:43 _Image attached_.

 

8:44 ok that doesn’t count, that’s the whole team!

 

8:45 _Image attached._

8:45 _better?_

 

8:47 oh

8:48 when was that pic even taken?

8:48 /where/ was that pic even taken?

 

8:49 _your birthday last year. remember?_

8:50 _we sat on the hill by the stream that links the park to our neighborhood, and taketora set off fireworks until the park management showed up and made us leave._

 

8:51 i remember that but i don’t remember that pic

 

8:53 _you stole a box of sparklers, remember? and yaku brought his camera and was taking pictures of everyone, so that picture was taken when we were looking at the sparklers_

 

8:55 oh

8:55 i’m gonna make that my background 2 ok

 

8:56 _alright_

 

8:57 we’ll b matching :^)

8:59 thank you, btw. that helped a lot

 

9:00 _no problem, kuroo_

9:01 _you always act excited and happy all the time and i always pretend to be annoyed, so it is admittedly kind of worrying when you’re not acting like yourself_

 

9:03 that’s probably the nicest thing u’ve ever said 2 me

 

9:04 _you act like you don’t know that i care about you_

 

9:05 i kno u care about me

9:05 mayb i forget sometimes but i do kno

 

9:06 _good_

 

9:06 alright well i’m going to get back 2 studying bc i still need to do well on this exam

9:07 but i’ll txt u tmrw

 

9:08 _alright, good luck_

 

* * *

 

 

10:23 _you’ll do fine_

 

* * *

 

 

_ **Friday, December 16th** _

11:32 _how was the exam?_

 

11:58 i think it went gr8 tbh :^)

 

11:59 _good_

 

* * *

 

 

1:27 **what iff i got akaashi one of those couple sweaters that u havve to share with ur boyfriiend!!**

 

1:28 bro that’s like rly cute??

 

1:30 _considering the fact that you don’t live anywhere near each other anymore, i don’t know how often he’d be able to wear it_

 

1:31 oh

 

1:31 **:(( i thoughtt it was cute**

 

1:32 it is, bro

1:32 don’t let kenma get u down

1:33 ur a romantic genius

1:34 i’ll wear the sweater w u!!

 

1:35 **oH MY GOD YES**

1:35 **hey kuroo where is ur ccredit card just wondering**

 

1:36 i think it’s in my wallet in the kitchen, y?

 

1:37 **no reason :)))**

 

1:37 bo nO

 

1:38 _kuroo likes reindeer patterns best, koutarou_

 

1:39 **thanks kenma!!!**

 

1:40 BO

 

* * *

 

 

5:43 ok what if!!

5:43 what if u got him a pair of mittens…except u kept 1 of them…so that whenever he got cold…he’d hav 2 hold ur hand with the other hand!!!

 

5:46 **omgg!! :DDDD**

5:46 **thatt’s so cute bro**

 

5:49 _so they’d both get frostbite?_

5:49 _that sounds so practical_

 

5:50 **DDDD:**

 

5:51 smh back 2 the drawing board i guess

 

5:52 _maybe winter-themed presents aren’t the best ideas_

 

* * *

 

 

7:38 kenma i hav 2 leave 4 practice rn but i wanna tlk about smthn when i get back ok?

 

7:45 _alright_

 

* * *

 

 

11:20 ugh i’m back n i’m exhausted

11:20 lay me in my grave now

 

11:21 _are you okay?_

 

11:22 yea i’m fine i’m just dead

11:22 coach thought we’d been having 2 many easy practices lately so he brought the hammer down

 

11:23 _sounds like you need to work out even more, if just one tough practice kills you_

 

11:24 i work out all the time!!

 

11:24 _mmhmm_

 

11:25 ok u kno wat, we’re gonna drop this

 

11:25 _alright. what was it you wanted to talk about earlier?_

 

11:26 oh, uh. that.

11:26 i was kinda hoping u’d forget. i was all ‘eyyy lets talk about it’ then but now i’d rly rather not, i think. 

 

11:27 _kuroo_

 

11:28 no rly it’s ok we don’t hav 2 tlk about it lol

 

11:28 _kuroo_

 

11:29 just forget it haha

11:29 no harm no foul right?

 

11:30 _tetsurou_

 

11:33 …fine

11:33 um ok

11:34 wat would u say

11:34 if i told u

11:34 i’m kinda in love w someone

 

11:37 _well, i would say that certainly came out of nowhere_

 

11:37 believe me, i know

11:37 or, well, maybe not

11:37 i feel like it was there a longass time

11:38 just recently it kinda came up like WHAM

11:38 punched me in the fucking face, yknow?

11:38 like holy shit, i’m in /love/

 

11:40 _did koutarou wear yoga pants again?_

 

11:40 no i’m actually srs this time

11:40 (tho bo’s butt has no right to look that good in those pants tbh)

 

11:41 _you’re seriously in love with someone?_

 

11:42 yea

11:42 rly stupid love that makes me wanna punch myself in the face bc i’m stupid to even fall 4 this person

11:42 the kind of love that ppl write songs about, yknow?

 

11:43 _yeah, i know_

 

11:44 n i’m kinda scared, yknow?

 

11:45 _yeah_

11:46 _i get it_

 

11:46 i don’t wanna fuck things up bc i ALWAYS do that

11:47 n usually it’s ok to fuck up bc it’s not w anyone important

11:47 but this is important

11:48 so it scares me

 

11:49 _kuroo, you don’t fuck things up. this is the person we were talking about a few days ago, right? the ‘impossible’ person?_

 

11:49 right

 

11:50 _well, if you’ve thought this much about them and your own feelings, don’t you think that means something? usually you like to run away from your feelings. that’s why you rarely ever date anyone. but if you’re thinking that much and being this careful, i really don’t think you’d fuck it up._

11:51 _you always make the right decision when you think_

 

11:52 maybe

11:52 but that’s just 1 problem. the other problem (n let’s b honest, the bigger one) is what if they don’t feel the same?

 

11:53 _i think they’d be stupid if they didn’t feel the same about you_

 

11:54 …u rly think that?

 

11:55 _yes, but if you tease me about that tomorrow, i’m not going to reply_

 

11:56 does that mean i hav 4 min to tease u about it

 

11:57 … _three_

 

11:57 KENMA U LOVE ME

11:58 ur so cute n sweet n supportive when it’s late n when ur trying to comfort me

11:58 u /care/ about me

11:58 how cute

11:59 i’m dying over here

11:59 mayb i’d b less dumb all the time if u just told me things like that ;))))

11:59 u should say sweet things more often it’s rly cute

 

12:00 _time’s up_

 

12:00 ok that’s fair

12:00 and, um, thx 4 the help, or pep talk, or whatever that actually was

12:01 (good morning btw)

 

12:02 _good morning_

12:02 _we can call it a pep talk. that’s…less embarrassing_

 

12:03 :^)

 

12:03 _don’t you dare start again_

 

12:04 :^(

12:05 ok but…srsly, thank u

 

12:06 _it’s no problem. can i ask something, though?_

 

12:06 anything

 

12:07 _are you going to tell them how you feel?_

 

12:08 oh. um.

12:08 idk, rly.i could but, again, i’m kinda scared. rly scared, actually. so i might just let things b as they r now, 4 a little while at least.

 

12:09 _well, when you do tell them (and i think you should, because at least then you’d know how they feel instead of constantly wondering. and if they care about you enough, even if they don’t return your feelings, they’ll still be your friend), can you tell me what they say?_

 

12:10 u wanna kno wat they say?

 

12:11 _yes, i’m just. i care about you, so i’d want to know how it goes, of course._

12:11 _that’s all_

 

12:12 right, yeah. i’ll tell u how it goes, if i tell them

12:13 *when i tell them, i guess

 

12:14 _thank you_

 

12:16 r u gonna get some sleep?

12:16 i kno it’s friday but ur cranky in mornings n u shouldn’t do that 2 ur mom

 

12:17 _i’m not cranky in the mornings_

 

12:18 are too

 

12:18 _am not_

 

12:18 are too

 

12:19 _am not. whatever. i’m just going to go to bed._

 

12:20 :^) goodnight kenma

 

12:21 _goodnight, kuroo_

 

12:22 _i hope things work out for you_


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we're entering the home stretch folks. buckle up and enjoy the ride.
> 
> EDIT: midterms destroyed me this past month, but i'm finally on break, so don't worry, the next chapter is coming this week (and the epilogue following shortly after). bless u folks that are sticking with me lmaooo

_ **Saturday, December 17th** _

8:50 **???? http://www.stupid.com/2013-fat-cats-calendar.html**

 

9:00 _no_

 

9:01 **:((((**

9:02 **it’s on sale thoo**

 

9:05 bro it’s not even 2013 wtf

9:06 how did u even find that

9:06 isn’t akaashi allergic 2 cats

9:15 …but also u should get me that calendar 4 christmas thx

 

* * *

 

 

10:52 wait when r u visiting me

10:53 ur parents said u could visit me on christmas right? bc they’re going away

10:54 so r u coming on christmas eve? how long r u staying w me?

 

10:57 _i don’t know. i’m busy._

 

10:58 r u srs rn

10:59 kenma u said u’d visit me. ur parents said u’d visit me on christmas. if ur not here, who’s keeping u company on christmas? there’s literally no way i’m leaving u alone on christmas.

 

11:01 _i know what they said. and i’m still visiting you. it just might be a little later._

 

11:02 wtf

11:02 how much is ‘a little later’

 

11:03 _a few days? i’ll come after christmas_

 

11:04 kenma i will literally take a train myself 2 come get u n keep u company

11:04 u cannot b alone on christmas

 

11:05 _i won’t be, i’ll stay with my aunt. it’s alright, kuroo. calm down. i’ll visit two days later._

 

11:06 2 days? that’s so long!!

 

11:07 _it’s really not_

 

11:08 but it is when i haven’t seen u 4 months

11:08 u kno how needy i am :^(

 

11:09 _trust me, i know_

11:10 _you can have koutarou to comfort you_

 

11:11 nah man bo’s gonna be spending most of those 2 days w akaashi

11:12 akaashi’s comin down on the 24th bc he actually cares about bo

 

11:13 _i care about you_

 

11:14 do u rly

11:14 do u care enough 2 get me a present 4 christmas

 

11:15 _yes_

 

11:16 omg srsly? we usually just hang out n play video games

11:16 ur rly getting me a present?

 

11:17 _i mean, if you want one_

 

11:18 wat r u getting me???

 

11:19 _that defeats the purpose of it being a surprise, doesn’t it?_

 

11:20 ok that’s fair

11:21 im gonna go out 4 lunch w bo soon so i’ll ttyl

 

11:22 _have fun_

 

* * *

 

 

3:31 wat r u doin rn

 

3:40 _playing video games_

 

3:41 omg idk y i even asked

3:42 u wanna video chat me?

 

3:44 _my dad is home so i wouldn’t be able to use audio_

 

3:44 that’s fine, i’m in the library so neither can i

3:45 we can just chat

3:45 i just wanna c ur face

 

3:47 _okay_

3:47 _give me one second to log on_

 

3:48 :)))))

 

3:52 _okay_

 

INCOMING CALL

 

3:53 hi :^)

3:53 wow

3:53 it’s been 2 long since i’ve seen u!

 

3:54 _you look tired_

 

3:54 wow ok

3:54 straight 4 the kill

 

3:55 _no, i meant…are you ok?_

 

3:55 yea just lots of papers 2 write

3:56 it’s ok tho

3:56 ur smiling :^)

 

3:56 _no i’m not_

 

3:57 yes u r

3:57 is someone happy 2 c me :^))))

 

3:58 _i’m not smiling_

3:58 _but yes_

 

3:58 i missed u

 

3:59 _we text every day_

 

3:59 yea but

 

4:00 _i miss you too_

 

4:00 !!!!!!

4:00 hey don’t make that face

4:01 am i not allowed 2 b excited by that response

4:01 it’s not every day ur honest w me

 

4:02 _i’m always honest with you_

 

4:02 no ur not

4:02 n u kno it

 

4:03 _i may not say things but everything i do say is honest_

4:03 _will you stop with that face?_

4:04 _your laugh is hideous_

4:06 _oh my god_

 

4:07 omg

4:07 that was terrifying

 

4:07 _did the librarian just threaten you?_

 

4:08 i think she did

4:08 that was a low-key threat right

4:08 i’m not the only one feeling threatened am i

 

4:09 _i think that was a low-key threat_

 

4:10 holy shit

4:10 i’m scared

4:11 stop laughing!!

4:11 it’s not funny!

 

4:11 _it’s pretty amusing_

 

4:12 haha

4:12 well when i’m dead u’ll miss me

4:12 i’ll b lying in a ditch somewhere, murdered by a librarian, and u won’t even kno bc ur like forever away from here

4:13 smh

 

4:13 _well i will be with you in less than a week_

4:13 _do you think you can survive until then?_

4:14 _just stay away from dark places_

 

4:15 i can manage

4:15 ur in a good mood aren’t u

 

4:16 _what do you mean?_

 

4:16 u get all teasing 2 me n u stop hiding ur smile in ur hair

4:17 i like when ur in a good mood

4:17 did smthn happen at school today?

 

4:18 _no_

4:18 _i just like talking with you_

4:18 _even if we aren’t actually talking_

4:18 _it’s nice to be able to see you, like how it was last year_

 

4:19 ugh last yr

4:19 pls let me come back 2 nekoma

4:19 uni is so much work

4:19 n my fav person isn’t even here

 

4:20 _you have koutarou_

 

4:20 i c that smug face

4:20 u kno ur my fav person u little shit

 

4:21 _this isn’t smug, this is happy_

 

4:21 well i’ll b damned

4:21 i hav made the unreadable kenma kozume hapy?

4:21 egad!

 

4:22 _…you spelled egad correctly but not happy?_

 

4:22 omg shut up

4:22 i was typing fast

 

4:23 _whatever you say_

4:23 _(what does egad mean)_

 

4:24 omg uh

4:24 like

4:24 jeepers!

4:24 phooey!

4:24 STOP LAUGHING AT ME I S2G KENMA

4:24 IT’S NOT FUNNY

4:25 UR THE ONE WHO ASKED

 

4:25 _…phooey, kuroo? really?_

 

4:26 it’s not

4:26 ok stfu i can’t help it that phooey is just a fuckin weird word man

4:26 i dig it

4:26 i’m gonna start saying that

 

4:27 _no please_

 

4:27 uh uh no way mr

4:27 u just signed ur self up 4 my new catchphrase

4:27 phooey

 

4:28 _please stop_

 

4:29 no way ugh i’m cackling

 

4:30 _stop i can’t even hear you but your laugh is hideous and you’re making me feel bad for the others in the library_

 

4:30 i can’t help but

4:30 omg

 

CALL DISCONNECTED

 

* * *

 

 

4:46 she fuckin kicked me out!! the librarian kicked me out can u believe that? wtfffff

 

4:47 _do you want my honest answer?_

 

4:48 ok on second thought, no

 

* * *

 

 

9:11 **hey hey hey!!**

 

9:12 _hello koutarou_

9:13 _are we discussing more gift ideas?_

 

9:14 **haha no! actually just wanted to talk 2 u**

 

9:14 _both of us? this is group chat, remember?_

 

9:15 **nope just u :)))**

9:15 **kuroo is busy doing extrra laps for coach!! hee sassed the other team’s captain at one of ourr scrimmages and coach saw hahahah**

 

9:16 _i’m not even surprised_

9:17 _what did you want to talk about?_

 

9:18 **me and akaashi!!!**

 

9:19 _oh?_

 

9:20 **so u know how we were besst friends before dating, right??**

 

9:20 _yes_

 

9:21 **thatt got me thinking!! i was…wondering if we were speciall!**

 

9:22 _what do you mean?_

 

9:23 **well whatt wouuld u do if ur best frriend confessed to u? how would u react to that? :))))**

 

9:25 _that’s a really broad question_

 

9:26 **okk well what would u do if u felt thhe same? what iff u didn’t feel the same???**

 

9:27 _oh, i see_

9:28 _if i felt the same, then we would end up like you and akaashi, i suppose. so you two wouldn’t necessarily be special, in that case_

9:29 _and if i didn’t feel the same, then i would tell them, but i wouldn’t let that ruin our friendship. so i suppose you and akaashi would’ve ended up like that, too, if only one of you liked the other_

 

9:30 **so whatt ur saying is**

9:31 **u wouldn’t let anyything dumbb like that ruin ur friendship??? :))))**

 

9:32 _yes, that’s what i’m saying. though that might not apply to everyone, i don’t know. but in terms of me personally, how you got together with akaashi isn’t necessarily ‘special’_

 

9:32 **wow wow wow that’s so interesting!!! i’m surre kuroo would thinkk it’s intersting too :)))**

 

9:33 _alright…?_

9:33 _if you’re curious about what kuroo thinks, you could just ask him, you know_

 

9:35 **ok i will :)**

9:35 **kuroo whenn u get back from practice u should read this convversation :)))**

 

9:36 _alright, well, i’m going to go play a game, so do you need me any more?_

 

9:37 **nope!! thank u : >>>**

 

9:38 _no problem_

 

* * *

 

 

10:45 bo thank u

 

10:46 **:OOOO whatever do u mean??**

 

10:47 yknow, for that thing u did 4 me. the thing w the thing.

 

10:48 **the thhing that has nothing to do with this conversattion whatsoever?? ;)))**

 

10:49 yea, that thing. now shut up pls.

 

10:50 **: >>>>**

 

10:51 >:(((

 

10:52 _i appreciate the bonding moment you two seem to be sharing, but please stop texting me. i’m trying to beat this boss._

 

10:53 yessir

 

10:53 **whattever the cruel guy says!!**

 

* * *

 

 

_ **Sunday, December 18th** _

4:32 _can you help me with my homework?_

 

4:48 ya sure what is it

 

4:53 _it’s math. there’s this one topic i just don’t understand, but i remember you doing well last year_

4:54 _Image attached._

 

4:56 o ya i remember that. i can do that.

4:57 u want me to write down the steps to explain it? i can send a pic, it’s easier than explaining on here

 

4:58 _yes, thank you_

 

5:08 Image attached.

5:08 let me kno if u want more help

 

5:10 _so I was messing up the third step?_

 

5:11 no u were fine there, u just hav a tendency of dropping negatives cuz ur handwriting is kinda shit

 

5:11 _no it’s not_

 

5:12 is too

 

5:12 _is not_

 

5:12 is too

 

5:13 _is not. your handwriting is worse anyways._

 

5:14 ah, guilty as charged. so u figured it out?

 

5:15 _yes, thank you._

 

5:16 no prob

 

* * *

 

 

6:57 wait all this thinking-of-present stuff w bo got me thinking

 

6:58 _that can’t be good_

 

7:00 haha so funny

7:00 what do u want for christmas?

 

7:01 _nothing..?_

 

7:02 wtf who doesn’t want christmas presents

 

7:03 _alright get me a new psp_

 

7:04 u already hav a psp

 

7:05 _yes but the screen has a crack in the corner and it distracts me_

 

7:06 kenma i can literally hav a full conversation w u naked n w a fuckin cactus on my head n u wouldn’t even notice

7:06 n ur telling me a crack in the corner of ur screen is distracting

 

7:07 _yes_

 

7:08 smh ur getting coal in ur stocking

 

* * *

 

 

11:42 **whatt if**

11:42 **i bought keiji a star?? a star just for him!!!**

11:43 **(also we tallked today and he saidd i could call him keiji :))))))))**

 

11:49 _actually_

11:50 _that’s not actually a bad idea_

 

11:51 (omg first of all that’s gr8 bro, does he call u koutarou??)

11:52 second of all i love the idea but wat r u gonna name the star

 

11:52 **(he calls me kou :)))))**

11:53 **and i wass gonna name it bokuto!!!**

 

11:54 um ok ily n all 

11:54 but

 

11:55 _maybe you should hear out his reasoning first_

 

11:56 …that’s fair. ok bro y do u wanna name akaashi’s present after urself

 

11:57 **because whenn keiji and i talk he alwaays seems so sad that he’s not with me!!! so i thuoughtt if i nammed the star bokuto then he would always be ablle to see me!!!**

11:58 **near**

11:58 **or far**

 

11:58 whereeeeeever u r

 

11:59 _i think that would work, honestly_

 

12:00 dude

12:00 u hav kenma’s blessing

12:00 u hav my blessing

12:01 i think u got it

 

12:02 **:))))))))**

 

* * *

 

 

_ **Monday, December 19th** _

1:03 Image attached.

1:03 Image attached.

1:04 !!!!!

1:07 Video attached.

1:08 Image attached.

1:08 KENMA DO U SEE THIS

 

1:09 _i’m at school, stop bothering me_

 

1:10 ok bUT did u look at the pics??

 

1:11 _oh_

1:12 _it snowed already?_

 

1:13 yes isn’t it pretty??

1:13 bo n i skipped class 2 play in it

1:14 it’ll probably melt tmrw but it was fun while it lasted right?

 

1:15 _that’s a nice snowman_

 

1:16 thx here’s a pic of the snowman next to my shoe 4 size comparison

1:16 Image attached.

 

1:17 _either you have really large feet or that snowman is actually only six inches tall_

 

1:18 both actually

1:19 n u kno what they say about guys w big feet ;^)

 

1:20 _i’m turning my phone off_

 

1:20 wait no i’m sry

1:22 kenma :^((

1:25 …fine

 

* * *

 

 

8:21 _so i’m finishing cleaning up since practice is over, and everyone is gone. but i went to pack up my stuff and make sure that the shower stalls were all clean (you wouldn’t believe the weird stuff ozaki, one of the first years, leaves in there), and i found this pair of socks, right? you’re going to laugh because they’re just socks but these are just…weird._

8:23 _so i got a broom to try to…i don’t know, lift them out of the shower stall. and then lev came in and i kind of panicked because i didn’t think he’d be here this late? (and also because he asks SO many questions when he’s alone with me, and i don’t want to deal with that)_

8:24 _and now he’s just…sitting? on a bench, with his bag next to him. but he’s not doing anything with his bag, or making any move to actually leave._

8:25 _kuroo, i’m literally stuck in this shower stall with a broom and weird smelly socks because he won’t leave_

8:27 _he’s clipping his nails_

8:29 _can you please call him or something and ask him to leave. he won’t even question it, it’s you, he’ll just leave_

8:34 _no_

8:35 _yaku called him_

8:37 _they’re talking about things that shouldn’t be talked about in a locker room_

8:38 _i wanted to go home twenty minutes ago_

8:40 _“what would you do to me if i was there, yaku-san?”_

8:45 _kuroo THEY’RE TALKING ABOUT_

8:45 _oh god i dropped the broom_

9:15 _i’m home. i don’t want to talk about it. that was the single most scarring experience of my life and thank you for nothing, goodbye._

 

* * *

 

 

10:15 omg

10:15 practice ran late

10:15 i

10:15 i’m sry?

10:16 lmao i’m trying so hard not 2 laugh

 

10:25 _we’re never talking about it again_

 

10:26 whatever u want bud

 

* * *

 

 

10:49 _my hair is too long_

10:49 _lev (who we are no longer talking about ever again) pointed it out today, and gave me a headband that he borrowed from his sister_

 

10:50 omg

10:50 send me a pic

 

10:51 _no_

 

10:52 pls :^(((

 

10:53 _no_

 

10:54 ugh fine

10:54 alright y don’t u go get it cut

 

10:55 _i don’t want to_

 

10:56 ur 2 lazy aren’t u

 

10:56 _no_

10:58 _maybe_

 

10:59 lol i’ll cut it 4 u when u come visit ok?

 

11:00 _you will? i don’t know if i trust that_

 

11:01 oh pls. i’m gr8 @ cutting hair!

11:01 i cut bo’s hair all the time

 

11:02 _my point exactly_

 

11:02 ok rude

11:02 but srsly i’ll cut it however u want

 

11:03 _alright_

 

11:04 :^)

11:04 gotta cut it nicely 4 the person u like amirite haha

 

11:08 _cut it in whichever way you like best, then_

 

11:09 omg u trust my judgment that much??? that’s so sweet thank u

 

11:11 _right_

 

11:12 of course i’d probably just trim it tho

11:12 bc i like u best as u r

11:12 we could dye it again if u want?

11:12 but i personally think ur hair is cute

11:12 it adds character, u kno?

11:13 not like cute cute haha

11:13 just. cute.

 

11:15 _let’s not dye it then. just a trim_

 

11:16 omg rly? i’m so happy u trust my judgment 4 once

11:17 mayb u should give me a haircut 2 lol

 

11:18 _i’ve never cut anyone’s hair before…_

 

11:19 so? i trust u!!

 

11:20 _i trust you too, but i wouldn’t let you give me a tattoo if you’ve never given tattoos before_

11:20 _there’s a fine line between trust and stupidity_

 

11:21 wait

11:21 u wouldn’t trust me 2 give u a tattoo??

 

11:22 _no?_

11:22 _that’s a terrible idea, kuroo_

11:22 _in every way_

 

11:23 :^(

11:23 alright fine then what do u trust me with

 

11:23 _what do you mean_?

 

11:24 well u trust me w a haircut but not a tattoo so where do u draw the line w me

 

11:24 _with you?_

11:24 _i trust you to do anything to me_

11:25 _EXCEPT tattoos_

 

11:26 wait srsly

11:26 anything?

 

11:27 _well, yes_

11:27 _i trust you more than anyone_

11:28 _should i not?_

 

11:29 no no that’s just. haha wow.

11:30 i feel the same

11:30 trusting u, i mean

11:30 trust is a huge part of a good relationship!

11:30 not that we, yknow, hav 1 or anything

11:30 not that i wouldn’t date u!

11:31 i’m glad u trust me

 

11:35 _you’re flustered_

 

11:35 no??

 

11:36 _yes you are. it’s kind of funny. you almost never get flustered. what’s wrong?_

 

11:36 um nothing lol

 

11:39 _you think i can’t tell when you lie to me?_

 

11:40 well no

11:40 but usually ur nice enough not 2 bring it up

 

11:41 _usually, yes_

11:43 _because you’re smart and self-reliant and you usually figure things out on your own_

11:43 _but it’s been a few days now, and you still seem slightly off, so i’m bringing it up_

 

11:44 i’m ok, honestly

11:44 it’s just nerves

11:44 we talked about it earlier, remember?

 

11:45 _the person you love?_

 

11:49 yeah

 

11:50 _but it’s just me. you don’t need to get nervous around me. you can tell me_

 

11:51 haha kenma when did u turn into me?

11:52 but yeah. that’s just the thing. it’s you.

 

11:53 _what do you mean?_

 

11:53 nothing, kenma, srsly

 

11:55 _kuroo…_

11:56 _you know i’m trying, right? it’s hard for me to talk about serious stuff because i get nervous too, and i’m shy, but i’m trying to do this, for you_

 

11:57 i kno

11:58 trust me kenma, i kno!

11:58 it’s just. it’s like a secret, yknow? i want 2 tell u but i’m scared

 

11:58 _you always tell me secrets_

 

11:59 i kno i do

12:00 that’s just what we do, we’re honest w each other

12:00 good morning btw

 

12:01 _good morning_

12:01 _so why won’t you tell me what this secret is?_

 

12:02 there r some things even i won’t say over txt

12:02 i want to b there w u when i say it, alright?

12:03 i want to see ur face

12:03 i want to b able to hear u say it back

 

12:08 _kuroo_

 

12:09 oh god i didn’t

12:09 no just

12:10 ok pls forget it, i kno what that sounds like and i kno what that would mean 4 us so pls pls just forget it, alright? nothing here needs 2 change n i’ll stand by that statement bc that means i can stand by u, n if whatever just came out of my mouth (uh, via txt) has any possibility of ruining that, then, forget it

 

12:10 _i don’t think you ever needed to hear me to know i was saying it back_

 

12:12 oh

12:14 uh

 

12:15 _oh?_

 

12:16 wait r we talking about the same thing here bc i’m kinda freaking out n need 2 check

 

12:17 _i mean, like you said, i would prefer to wait to say it when i see you again_

12:18 _but i’m assuming yes_

 

12:19 assuming?

12:20 it’s a 3 word thing right

12:20 just checking 2 b sure

12:20 yknow, bc it’s v important 2 b sure on these kinds o things

12:20 right? i’m right right

 

12:21 _yes, a three word thing_

12:22 _if…if that’s okay_

 

12:23 oh

12:23 kenma ofc it’s ok r u srs rn

 

12:24 _i was worried_

 

12:25 YOU were worried??

12:25 kenma my entire life flashed before my eyes when i said that

12:25 u don’t understand

12:26 wait wtf

12:26 did this srsly HAPPEN

12:26 i’m going 2 hyperventilate

 

12:27 _don’t do that_

 

12:27 we r so STUPID

12:28 HOW FCUKING LONG HAV I STRESSED ABOUT THIS

 

12:29 _i mean_

12:29 _a week?_

 

12:30 ok but u kno me, i’m RLY stupid when it comes 2 this stuff

12:30 i don’t catch onto things fast enough

12:30 OBVIOUSLY

 

12:31 _kuroo, calm down_

 

12:32 omg

12:32 r u blushing rn

 

12:35 _no_

 

12:36 FUCK i want 2 b there, i want 2 c u blush

12:36 ur blushing bc of ME

 

12:37 _i said i wasn’t blushing_

 

12:38 yea but ur lying, duh, i can tell when ur lying

12:40 wait

12:41 I’M the person u couldn’t stop thinking about when u kissed that other guy?

 

12:42 _i mean_

12:42 _yes_

12:42 _can we stop talking about this_

12:43 _you said we can wait until we see each other again_

12:44 _you know…how i get when it comes to talking about this stuff_

 

12:45 yes i kno i’m sry, i’ll leave it b

12:45 …can i hav 3 minutes to freak out tho?

 

12:46 _…two_

 

12:46 KENMA OMG

12:46 DO U HAV ANY IDEA WHAT THIS MEANS

12:46 WE HAV BEEN 2GETHER 4 SO LONG BUT

12:46 THIS IS

12:46 FUCK I CAN’T SAY IT, I’LL WAIT TIL I C U

12:46 BUT

12:47 i’m rly happy, ok?

12:47 i rly rly rly was scared 2 fuck things up between us

12:47 n i didn’t even want to say (or, eh, /imply/) anything bc ur perceptive as shit n u would immediately figure it out

12:47 n it just kinda slipped out

12:47 but god

12:48 i’m rly fucking happy

 

12:48 _that’s time. and it’s late._

12:48 _can we…talk more tomorrow?_

 

12:49 of course

12:49 we talk every day tho?

 

12:50 _i know. sorry. i don’t know why i asked_

 

12:51 no no it’s 100% ok

12:51 yes we can talk tmrw :^)

 

12:52 _okay. thank you._

12:53 _goodnight, kuroo_

 

12:54 goodnight, kenma

 

1:01 _i’m really happy, too_

 

* * *

 

 

3:42 …ok actually

3:42 i didn’t even /say/ it, but u knew

3:42 am i that oblvious

 

* * *

 

 

9:05 _i’m not sure if you meant to spell obvious or oblivious, but yes, you’re both_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> one chapter left lol
> 
> but would anyone want a very nsfw chapter six/epilogue or nah


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kuroo's kinks are so vanilla ft. guest star pretty boy keiji

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you guys for waiting so long for this chapter. TT u TT i owe you
> 
> EDIT 4/22: DUE TO FORMATTING DIFFERENCES, THE EPILOGUE IS GOING TO BE WRITTEN AS A SIDE PIECE

_ **Tuesday, December 20th** _

10:42 just double-checking last night wasn’t a dream

 

10:45 _it wasn’t_

 

10:46 ok. uh. good. 

10:46 have a good day at school 

 

* * *

 

 

3:15 **so let me gett this straight**

3:15 **or**

 

3:16 bro don’t make a gay joke

 

3:16 **let me get this gay!!**

3:17 **oh fuck ://///**

 

3:18 …whatever proceed

 

3:19 **sorry!!**

3:19 **um but sso u guys admitted ur feelings finally…but ur not…together?????**

 

3:20 um no offense bc u kno i would tell u but i didn’t so who told u

3:20 kenma i s2g i didn’t tell him

 

3:21 _oh, no, that was me._

 

3:22 ???

 

3:23 **yeah keiji told me:))))) it was reallyy cute!!**

3:23 **but i don’t understand because when i told keiji i liked him, we were boyfriendss just like that :))**

 

3:24 bo that’s rly cute but we didn’t tell each other anything

 

3:25 **OH NO.. KENMA IGNORE EVERYYTHING I JUST SAID!!!**

 

3:26 _it’s okay, we already know_

 

3:26 yeah bro it’s ok, rly

 

3:27 **?????!!!!???**

 

3:27 we, uh. we’ll tell each other officially when kenma visits

 

3:27 _not over text_

 

3:28 ^yea. but we both…kno how we feel, yknow?

 

3:28 **ooooohhhhhhhhhh**

3:29 **u guys r really compplicated :////**

3:29 **i don’tt think i’d be able to pick up on it if keiji told me he loved me**

3:29 **uh, didn’t tell me he loved me**

3:30 **????**

 

3:31 it’s ok bo, it’s complicated ik

 

3:31 _we’ve known each other longer, koutarou_

 

3:31 (n i’m also a shy soul)

 

3:32 _sure you are, kuroo_

 

3:33 wat? i am. don’t b rude

 

3:33 _you’re in no way shy_

 

3:33 am too

 

3:34 _are not_

 

3:34 am too!

 

3:35 **awww u guyss r cute :))))**

 

3:36 _i need to focus on class. both of you leave me alone_

 

3:37 (aw look at that bro u embarrassed him ;^))

 

* * *

 

 

6:56 _Image attached._

 

6:57 nice sunglasses

6:58 ohhh also nice ponytail???

7:00 wat r u guys doing that requires such fashion

 

7:01 _lev’s sister is in town_

 

7:01 so…ur trying to find her?

 

7:02 _taketora and the first years are_

7:02 _they dragged me along_

7:03 _lev is following us as if he’s going to prevent them from finding her, but he started panting and complaining about the cold ten minutes ago. right now we’re waiting at a street corner for him to catch up, because we don’t want him getting lost_

 

7:04 oooh well when u find her, tell her kuroo (the hot previous captain) said ‘panini’

 

7:05 _you do know that’s not actually russian, right?_

 

7:05 ok then tell her kuroo (the rly hot previous captain) said ‘hello’

7:06 but ask lev if he knos how 2 say it in russian

 

7:06 _oh, please_

7:07 _if lev knew any russian, he wouldn’t be asking me how to talk to his grandma_

 

7:07 wait u kno russian wtf

 

7:08 _no, i don’t know russian. but lev thinks i do. it’s how i get him to leave me alone._

 

7:09 hold on, let me clarify

7:09 u tell lev fake russian words so that he’ll leave u alone, and he goes and tells them to his grandma??

 

7:10 _i mean, i don’t know if he actually remembers them when he talks to his grandma, so_

7:11 _oh, we spotted lev at the end of the street. looks like it’s time to move_

 

7:12 keep me posted on mission impossible, agent kozume. over.

 

7:12 _we’re not using walkie-talkies_

 

7:12 i don’t like ur attitude. over.

 

7:13 _kuroo can we not_

 

7:13 sry? wat was that? i can’t understand u. over.

 

7:14 _we’re not even talking. we’re texting._

 

7:14 i’m not reading u. over.

 

7:14 _agent kozume would like agent kuroo to kindly shut up_.

 

7:15 …?

 

7:16 _over._

 

7:16 agent kuroo thinks that is rude. over.

 

7:16 _i don’t care. over._

 

7:17 agent kuroo thinks that it’s cute ur playing along ;^)

 

7:17 _sorry? i didn’t get that bit_

 

7:17 OVER. you’re cute. over.

 

7:18 _stop flirting with me. i’m busy. over._

 

7:18 ok but ur flirting back ;^) over.

 

7:19 _am not. over._

 

7:19 are too. over.

 

7:19 _am not._

 

7:19 are too.

 

7:20 _stop it, taketora keeps looking at me weird._

 

7:20 oh??

7:22 taketora says ur smiling at ur phone

 

7:23 _you did not just snoop on me_

 

7:23 no

7:23 maybe

7:24 ok yes i snooped on u

7:24 but ur smiling at ur phone, how could i not!

7:25 i am swooning

 

7:28 _bokuto says you’re just lying down eating your third pack of lunchables and grinning like an idiot_

 

7:29 that snitch

7:29 ok but i’m swooning deep down, n i’m picturing u sweeping me off my feet n catching me n swinging me around like in the movies

 

7:30 _you do realize how heavy you are, right?_

 

7:30 um yes but u do realize i’ve seen ur legs right? ‘kozume’ n ‘leg day’ r synonymous

 

7:31 _that doesn’t mean i’d want to carry you around anywhere_

 

7:31 embarrassed to be seen w me?

 

7:31 _too lazy to carry a grown man maybe_

 

7:32 ohhh i’m a man now am i

 

7:32 _your birthday was last month, so yes_

7:33 _oh we lost lev again, looks like we’re stopping_

 

7:34 ok if lev is complaining then how r u not complaining

7:34 u used to complain all the damn time last yr

 

7:35 _yes because you’d let me sit out if i complained enough_

7:35 _i don’t get that luxury this year_

7:36 _also one of the first years just moved here for akita and he lent me a big coat so i’m not really that cold_

 

7:36 excuse me

7:37 u did not just admit to taking advantage of my kind heart

 

7:37 _that is a strong accusation_

7:38 _oh…looks like lev is a little worn out. i think we’re going to stop for coffee while he catches his breath, and then he can continue chasing us_

 

7:39 u guys r so mean 2 him!! be nice 2 him, he’s trying

 

7:40 _kuroo you paid him 100 yen to put honey on his face and then threw breadcrumbs at him. we couldn’t get the pigeons away from him for half an hour_

 

7:40 ok well u kno wat

7:41 it’s not my fault he believed me when i said ‘honey is gr8 4 ur skin’

7:41 i mean

7:41 who does that??

 

7:42 _you have a fair point_

7:42 _lev’s joining us for coffee, looks like_

 

7:43 i’ll pay u 100 yen if u can get me a video of him taking a shot of espresso

 

7:43 _keep your money. i’ll do that for free_

 

7:43 ohhh ur evil, agent kozume

 

7:44 _stop calling me kozume_

7:45 _ok he’s buying the espresso_

 

7:45 wtf that was so fast, how tf did u manage 2 convince him??

7:46 (also aw u like me calling u by ur first name huh)

 

7:47 _i told him espresso makes him grow taller_

7:47 ( _ignoring that)_

 

7:48 wtf he’s trying to grow taller? some ppl r just 2 greedy in this world

 

7:48 _at least you’re not five foot seven_

 

7:49 wat, u don’t like ur height? i think it’s cute

7:49 ur the perfect hugging height

 

7:50 _i didn’t realize there was such a thing_

 

7:51 there is

7:51 ask anyone on nekoma who they’d wanna hug, they’ll all say u

 

7:52 _why does it sound like this is a conversation you’ve had before_

 

7:53 oh lol bc we discussed this thoroughly after u fell asleep in last yr’s training camp

7:53 yaku was on the fence 4 the longest time but he chose u anyways bc u weren’t /too/ tall

7:54 so voila, perfect hugging height

 

7:55 _you guys are weird_

7:57 _Video attached_.

 

7:58 omg????

7:58 HE FUCKING SPITS IT OUT

7:58 ON YAMAMOTO

7:58 KENMA I’M DEAD

7:59 I’M DYING

 

8:00 _take your time_

 

8:00 y is lev taking an espresso shot the best video i’ve ever seen in my life

8:01 i’m sending that 2 yaku

 

8:02 _they’re kicking us out of the coffee shop now, actually. looks like we’re back on the hunt for alisa_

8:02 _lev’s whining again_

 

8:03 ew give him a pacifier

 

8:03 _ugh_

8:03 _and we’re running again. i’ll text you later_

 

8:05 tell my beautiful russian wife i love her

 

* * *

 

 

9:45 _Image attached_.

 

9:51 see? perfect hugging height. even alisa agrees

 

* * *

 

 

_ **Wednesday, December 21st** _

11:02 i hav 2 ask, captain-san

 

11:05 _never call me that again_

 

11:05 aye-aye

11:06 do u do my speeches before the games?? 

 

11:07 _you mean those stupid ‘blood in our veins’ things?_

11:08 _no_

 

11:08 WHAT

11:09 THOSE ARE NEKOMA TRADITION

 

11:11 _i don’t, but taketora does_

 

11:12 oh

 

11:14 _can you honestly picture me saying that kind of stuff? that’s…way too embarrassing_

 

11:15 ya but they’re a defining trait of nekoma’s volleyball

 

11:16 _they’re a defining trait of your volleyball, maybe_

11:16 _like i said, taketora says them, so no worries_

 

11:17 well maybe i enjoy picturing u saying them

 

11:18 _and why is that?_

 

11:19 …bc it’s hilarious

 

11:20 _my point exactly. way too embarrassing._

 

* * *

 

 

1:35 **Image attached.**

1:35 **slump cam!!!!**

1:36 **kenma would u give me moneyy if i woke him up by pouring ice watter on his head**

 

1:37 _only if you take a video_

 

1:45 **Video attached.**

1:45 **u can just give me some of ur pudding the next time u visit :))**

 

1:46 _deal_

 

* * *

 

 

2:15 ok u guys r mean n i am disgusted by this flagrant disrespect of our friendship

 

2:16 _Video attached._

 

2:16 **Video attached.**

 

2:17 yes ok i’ve seen the video, i lived thru the video, that’s enough, thank u v much

 

2:18 **: >>>**

 

* * *

 

 

10:30 hey so can i ask smthn

 

10:35 _my permission hasn’t stopped you before_

 

10:36 *an important smthn

 

10:36 _oh. well, alright_

 

10:37 um idk how 2 rly ask this w/out being blunt so

10:37 we talked about this a long while ago but i can’t rly remember

10:37 r u asexual, or whatever that word was?

10:38 like not interested in sex or anything like that

10:39 which is FINE, btw

10:39 it’s totally fine, idc at all, honestly!!

 

10:40 _i appreciate that, but not exactly_

10:41 _it’s…demisexual, i think._

 

10:42 what’s that?

 

10:43 _i do feel sexual attraction, like you, but it’s only after i really really like and am comfortable with someone, if that makes sense_

 

10:44 yea, i get it

10:46 so does that mean

10:46 like

10:46 uh

 

10:47 _yes_

 

10:48 yes?

10:48 wat do u mean by ‘yes’

 

10:49 _yes, i am attracted to you, kuroo_

10:50 _since you were going to have trouble asking_

 

10:51 ahaha

10:51 that’s

10:51 haha

 

10:52 _please calm down_

10:52 _you’re embarrassing me_

 

10:52 ok!! i’ll stop sry sry

10:53 i just! wow haha

 

10:54 _you’re thinking about sex_

 

10:54 no!

 

10:55 _you always laugh when you think about sex. why do you think the teachers kicked you out of class so often?_

 

10:56 wait no i don’t

10:56 wait 

10:57 FUCK NO, R U SRS

10:57 IS THIS A NOTICEABLE CHARACTER TRAIT

 

10:58 _i mean_

10:59 _did you ever notice how everyone would leave the locker room if you started giggling to yourself?_

 

11:00 FUCK

11:00 NO HOW DID THEY KNO ABOUT THAT

11:01 EVEN /I/ DIDN’T KNO ABOUT THAT

11:02 _…_

11:02 kenma no

11:02 u didn’t

 

11:03 _i mean, it was an accident?_

 

11:04 /u/ told them i laugh when i think about sex?

11:04 ohh u evil little shit

11:04 how did u even notice??

 

11:05 _kuroo, you laugh when you watch porn_

 

11:05 I DO NOT

11:07 …do i rly

 

11:08 _yes. at least, you laugh when you are pretending not to watch porn but very obviously are because i can hear it through your headphones_

 

11:09 sTOP

11:09 I DIDN’T KNO U COULD HEAR THOSE

 

11:10 _i know you weren’t watching buzzfeed videos, kuroo. i’m not that stupid._

 

11:11 fuck me

11:11 this is humiliating

 

11:13 _it’s honestly not even the most embarrassing thing you’ve done_

11:14 _(also, i’d take you up on that offer but i assume i wouldn’t be the one on top)_

 

11:14 pls don’t talk 2 me about more embarrassing things i’ve done 

11:15 um

11:15 hahaha wat

11:15 haha that’s

11:16 ahahaha

 

11:17 _:)_

 

11:17 STOP LAUGHING AT ME

11:18 I’M NOTICING IT NOW

11:18 also u can’t make those jokes anymore bc it’s rly rly unfair

 

11:19 _i never said it was a joke_

 

11:20 haHA I HAVE TO GO

11:20 BYE

11:20 (WE’LL TALK ABOUT THIS LATER)

11:20 (WHEN I STOP LAUGHING)

11:21 (FUCK U)

11:21 (srsly fuck u)

 

11:22 _(are you flirting with me or threatening me)_

 

11:23 (hahaha the first one i think??)

 

11:23 _(‘hahaha’ yeah definitely the first one)_

 

11:24 UGH

11:24 BYE

 

* * *

 

 

11:43 hypothetically speaking

 

11:45 _you were gone for like fifteen minutes_

 

11:46 ok thx, that’s enough

11:47 hypothetically speaking, if u were to visit me n we were 2 b together 4 the first time in months

11:47 how would things proceed

 

11:49 _what exactly are you asking me_

 

11:50 i am asking u

11:50 what u think would happen

11:51 hypothetically speaking

 

11:52 _i hope you would show me around campus, and i would be able to say hi to koutarou because it’s been a while, but i don’t think that’s what you’re asking now, is it?_

 

11:54 maybe not

 

11:55 _you mean…after we went back to your dorm?_

 

11:57 yeah

11:57 i just..wanna kno if we might hav the same train of thought

 

11:58 _i see_

11:58 _you do realize koutarou and you share a dorm, right?_

 

11:59 oh

 

11:59 _did that really not cross your mind?_

 

12:00 ok well

12:00 i mean

12:01 i can ask him to leave?

12:01 he wouldn’t mind, especially not after what happened last time akaashi visited

12:01 he owes me

12:02 we could b alone

 

12:04 _alone for a long time, i hope_

 

12:05 oh

 

12:05 _same train of thought?_

 

12:06 v much the same train of thought

12:07 shit ok but this is a dangerous fuckin train 2 b on, kenma

12:07 metaphors aside, thinking about anything near to that is not a good idea

 

12:08 _why is that?_

 

12:09 bc ur…ur u, n i don’t wanna start thinking about this n make u feel like u gotta do anything when u actually get here if u don’t wanna do it. n u’ve never done anything before rly, n ofc i’m petrified of accidentally hurting u or smthn (not that we’d necessarily get 2 a point where i could hurt u)

 

12:11 _you’re worrying too much_

12:11 _maybe i want you to think about these things_

12:12 _i’ve never done anything with another person, but it’s not like…kuroo, it’s not like i’m not well aware of my own body_

 

12:13 oh

12:14 haha fuck the train has derailed

12:14 i’m

12:14 ok ahaha

 

12:15 _please calm down_

 

12:15 ur a devil kenma

12:16 u could kill a man w just ur words

 

12:16 _i haven’t even said anything yet_

12:17 _besides, you’re the one who asked_

 

12:17 which was a grAVE mistake

12:18 bokuto is literally snoring 10 ft away from me

12:18 i beg of u 2 not continue

12:19 actually

12:19 i beg of u 2 save whatever ur gonna say 4 when u visit me

12:19 bc maybe i hav a kink 4 dirty talk

 

12:20 _that’s not even a kink, dirty talk is literally supposed to turn you on_

 

12:20 don’t b petty

 

12:21 _fine. i’ll make sure that i have plenty to say when i come_

12:22 _in order to make sure that you come_

 

12:22 that was UNNECESSARY

12:23 (please do)

12:23 GOODNIGHT

 

12:24 _sweet dreams_

 

* * *

 

 

_ **Thursday, December 22nd** _

8:14 _today is shouyou’s setter’s birthday_

 

8:17 oh?

 

8:18 _yeah_

 

8:19 cool story kenma

 

* * *

 

 

9:34 _i was just bringing it up because it made me realize you never told me what you wanted for christmas_

 

9:35 well u never told me wat u wanted either so

9:35 (and no, the psp thing doesn’t count)

 

9:36 _because i don’t want anything_

 

9:37 exactly

 

9:38 _fine. i’ll get you coal_

 

9:39 rude

 

* * *

 

 

12:48 i hav a surprise 4 u when u visit :^)

 

1:07 _should i be worried?_

 

1:08 wat? no! i’m havin sawamura’s bf bake u an apple pie

1:09 wait shit that was supposed to b a surprised

 

1:10 _well at least you lasted twenty minutes_

1:10 _and thank you_

 

1:11 np, he’s apparently rly good at baking so it should b up 2 ur standards

1:11 tho nothing i’ve ever baked has been up 2 ur standards so who knos

 

1:12 _no offense but i don’t think your baking is up to anyone’s standards_

 

1:12 ohhhh wait a min *pulls out receipts*

1:13 Magic Bars, Second Year, Kozume Kenma Wouldn’t Share Any of the Two Dozen

 

1:15 _oh. i forgot about those_

 

1:16 damn right u forgot about those

1:16 those things r my pride n joy

1:16 mayb i should make u those when u come

 

1:17 _if you do that, i’ll consider not playing any video games when i visit_

 

1:18 wait r u srs

1:19 u always play video games around me. always. in the entire history of kuroo & kenma

 

1:21 _i said i’d consider it, not that i’d necessarily do it. plus, maybe there’s something i like a bit more than video games_

 

1:22 wait wat is it?

 

1:24 _*someone_

 

1:24 OH

1:24 ohhhhhh u sly dog

1:25 ohohoho

 

1:25 _anyways, my break is over, so stop texting me. my teacher is actually starting to notice_

 

1:26 mayb that’s bc u keep smiling at ur phone ;^)

 

1:27 _i’m blocking you_

 

1:27 okAY okay

 

* * *

 

 

5:30 ugh ugh UGH my coach is so MEAN practice is so HARD

5:30 it’s the last practice b4 break so he’s like ‘blah blah working overtime 2 compensate 4 the shit u’ll b eating’ n i h8 this man kenma

5:30 i h8 him so much

 

5:35 _try not to die_

 

5:36 FINE

 

* * *

 

 

8:47 bo n i r watching spiderman n i was wondering

8:47 if i were to find a way to hang upside down, would u make out w me like mary jane

 

8:49 _no_

 

8:50 uh…reasons??

 

8:51 _because you’d look stupid and i don’t want to be associated_

 

8:53 ok that’s fair

 

* * *

 

 

** _Friday, December 23rd_ **

1:17 have i ever told u how much i fucking LOVE christmas??

1:17 like i rly wish u could b here rn bc bo is turning up the christmas tunes n we r jamming n life is GOOD

1:18 we got some prepackaged cookie dough popped in the dorm oven rn n it smells fantastic

1:19 bo’s taping up some mistletoe 4 when u n akaashi visit in a few days

1:19 (just pretend 2 not notice it pls)

1:21 i think we’re gonna make a gingerbread house later

1:21 ok u kno wat? i’m taking my love 4 christmas 2 the gc

 

* * *

 

 

1:22 IT’S BEGINNING 2 LOOK A LOT LIKE CHRISTMAS

 

1:23 **annnnnywhere YOU GOOOOOOO**

 

1:23 bro it’s everywhere u go

 

1:24 **oh sttop it, ur so sweet!!!!!**

 

1:25 i meant

1:25 nvm ya 

1:26 u must b the spirit of christmas, wanna kno y?

 

1:26 **why??**

 

1:27 bc ily :^)

 

1:27 **awww i love u too!!! what doees that make kenma : >>>**

 

1:27 that makes kenma santa bc I FUCKIN LOVE SANTA

 

1:28 **i’m dyingg**

1:28 **i love you guyss**

 

1:29 ily22222

 

1:30 _this is sweet and all_

1:30 _but aren’t you two in the same room?_

 

1:31 **KENMAAAA**

 

1:32 WE MISSED U

 

1:32 _how much eggnog have you two been drinking?_

 

1:33 we just wanted 2 get ur attention

1:33 n what better way to celebrate the joy that is christmas eve eve than to celebrate 2gether :^)

1:33 our family :^)))

 

1:34 **where everyyone loves each other**

 

1:34 _well_

1:35 _if that’s the case, then i suppose i’ll humor you two_

1:36 _one moment_

 

1:36 :^)

 

1:36 **: >**

 

1:36 :^))))

 

1:37 **: >>>>>**

 

1:38  hello, kuroo-san, koutarou

 

1:38 **KEIJIIIII**

 

1:38 akaashi!!

 

1:39 _i added him. it seemed appropriate for the spirit_

 

1:40 **thank u kenma i love u : >>>>**

1:40 **so does kuroo : >>**

 

1:40 _i know, i love you too_

 

1:41  as do I

 

1:41 ayyyyyy me 2 bro ily 2

 

1:42 _this got sickeningly sweet_

 

1:42 shhh kenma don’t b a spoilsport

1:42 enjoy this

 

1:43 **sleigh bells riiiiiing**

 

1:43 rrrrr u listenin’

 

1:43 **in the laaaaaaane**

 

1:44 snow is glistenin’

 

1:44 **A BEAUTIFULL SIIGHT**

 

1:44 WE’RE HAPPY 2NIGHT

 

1:45 **(c’mon guyss i know u can do it :)))**

 

1:46 (don’t leave us hangin pls pls pls)

 

1:47 _keiji do you want to have the honors?_

 

1:47  I don’t think I have a choice

1:47  walking in a winter wonderland

 

1:48 AYYYYYY

 

1:48 **i love u :’))))**

 

1:49 cute

1:49 kenma when u visit on monday can u bring me one of those chocolate santas

1:49 make that my christmas present

 

1:50 **monday? wait but..**

 

1:50  koutarou.

 

1:51 **ohhhh right monday :))**

 

1:51 _i’ll try_

 

1:52 **becauuse kenma is at home!! by himself. nowhere near us!!!**

 

1:53 bo wtf

 

1:53  kou I think it’s best to leave the topic be

 

1:54 _yes, please don’t_

 

1:54 i’m missing smthn

1:54 WAIT A MIN

1:55 kenma r u missing us (me)?

1:56 r u sad? it’s ok it’s only 3 more days

 

1:57 _sure_

 

1:58  I wouldn’t worry too much, kuroo-san

 

1:59 I GOT A GR8 IDEA

 

2:00 **whatt is it????**

 

2:00 we should all video chat

2:01 2 celebrate the good spirit

2:01 (oh bo can u get the cookies out of the oven, they’re ready)

 

2:02 **i’m on it!! :))**

 

2:03 _um, i don’t really think video-chatting is a good idea_

 

2:04 y not???

2:04 ur not busy bc ur never busy

 

2:04 _i know, but i can’t_

 

2:05  he’s with me right now

 

2:05 ok?? then u 2 can share a phone

2:05 also shame on u kenma, u always make fun of me n bo being in the same room but look at u n akaashi

 

2:06 **Image attached.**

2:06 **cookies are done :))))**

2:07 **also wait u guyss are together??**

 

2:08  um, actually he just left. to go to the store. so he can’t videochat

 

2:09 _yes, exactly. i’m busy_

 

2:10 **ohhhhh**

 

2:11 oh??

2:11 wtf y r u guys so shady

2:11 i need new friends

 

2:12 **excuse u!! this is our family, didd u forget?**

 

2:13 o shit ur right

2:13 that was mean of me

2:13 u guys r my fav ppl in the world

 

2:14 **chriiiistmas chriiistmas tiiiime is heeeere**

2:15 **bro?**

 

2:15 shit

2:16 i don’t kno that one????

2:16 i’m sry bro i’m letting u down but. what???

 

2:17 _it’s from alvin and the chipmunks, kuroo_

 

2:17  I think the next line is ‘time for toys and time for cheer’

 

2:18 wtf how do u 2 kno that and not me

 

2:19  kou made us watch the movie with him last year during christmas break because you were busy

 

2:20 **yeah sorry bro :///**

 

2:21 it’s ok

2:21 can u bring me a cookie pls

 

2:22 **i’ll bring u two :***

 

2:23 _i have to go. i’ll talk to you all later_

 

2:23 bye kenma ;^*

2:24  talk to you soon

 

2:25 **i’m sure it’ll be soonner than we think haha!!**

 

2:25 ?

 

2:25  koutarou.

 

2:26 **JUST HEAAR THOSE SLEIGH BELLS JINGLIN**

 

2:27 RING TING TINGLIN TOO

 

2:27 **c’MONN it’s lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with u :)))**

 

2:28 outside the snow is FALLIN n friends r callin

 

2:30  …yoohoo

 

2:31 (!!!!) c’mon it’s lovely weather 4 a sleigh ride 2gether w u ;^)

 

2:32 **Giddy YAP GIIDY YAP GIDYDY YAP**

 

2:32 let’s goose

2:32 *goooooo

 

2:33  alright, I’m leaving. have fun with this

2:33  I hope you two don’t annoy kenma this often

 

2:34 we don’t i swear

 

2:34 **yeah keiji pinkky promise :))**

 

2:35  …sure. have a nice christmas eve eve

 

2:36 u too!

 

2:37 **(texxt me later)**

 

2:38 ew gross ur gay lol

 

2:38 **shut up! ur gay!!**

 

2:39 gay 4 u

 

2:40 **bro :))**

 

* * *

 

 

7:23 _so it’s awfully cold here, isn’t it?_

 

7:27 where?

 

7:28  _you know, where you live_

 

7:30 yea

7:31 wait what

 

7:32 _open the door_

 

* * *

 

 

12:52 **would u two kindly PIPE DOWN**

12:52 **I LEFT THE ROOM BUT I’M STILL NEXT DOOR**

 

12:54 _i’m sorry, koutarou. it’s his fault_

 

12:54 haha bo suck my dick

 

12:55 **sounds like i don’tt need to, dude**

12:55 **u got thaat covered on your own**

12:56 **i respect that, i do, but some people are trying TO SLEEP**

 

12:56  kou, go to bed

 

12:57 **okay!!!!**

 

* * *

 

 

1:32 **wow kenma i didn’t knoww u could curse that much hahah**

1:32 **like wow thatt was really loud**

1:33 **i’ve never even heard akaashi say fuck i think**

1:34 **especially not ‘fucck me’ lololol**

 

1:36 bo i love u but SHUT UP

 

* * *

 

 

** _Saturday, December 24th_ **

8:46 hey kenma!! what do u want from the bakery

 

8:49 _you’re at the bakery?_

8:50 _when did you even leave…?_

 

8:50 like 30 min ago, i know u like 2 sleep in lol so i didn’t wanna wake u

8:50 they’ve got a gr8 apple pastry

 

8:51 _oh, i want one_

 

8:53 i knew it lol i already got u one

8:54 hey kenma?

 

8:54 _yes?_

 

8:55 i love you

 

8:56 _i know_

8:56 _you told me many times last night_

 

8:57 i kno, i just wanted 2 say it again

8:57 bc i do

8:58 i rly do

 

8:59 _and you even spelled it out fully_

 

9:00 i can spell when it’s smthn important yknow

 

9:01 _you can? shocking._

 

9:02 ur so mean 2 me

 

9:02 _maybe_

9:04 _kuroo?_

 

9:04 what?

 

9:05 _i love you too_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "merry christmas everyone"  
> ~me, in March

**Author's Note:**

> it's honestly not that angsty i swear


End file.
